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12 Totally Random Predictions for 2012

Annette Bourdeau — 2012-01-05T14:20:00+00:00

I know what you're all thinking. Oh, great: more totally random predictions that will never actually happen. What a waste of time! Well, you're right and you're wrong. I'm not one to gloat, but one of my totally random predictions from 2011 came to be (for your reference, check #2). Yes, Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively found love in 2011. So am I an oracle? Probably not. After all, BiebGa still hasn't happened. But does this justify the roll-out of a new set of predictions for 2012? Oh, yes.

2011 wasn't a great year for celebrity couples that everybody said wouldn't last. Ashton and Demi finally collapsed - though they stuck it out a lot longer than all the haters predicted! And, of course, Russell Brand just filed for divorce from his darling Katy. Shocking, right? I didn't realize a union sealed within steps of a tiger sanctuary could ever fail, with the proximity to tiger's blood and all.

Speaking of tiger's blood, one thing I definitely didn't see coming: 'Two and a Half Men' killing off Charlie Sheen. That's a pretty finite move. Bold. Very bold. Perhaps one of the boldest moves ever executed by a network sitcom. But I digress. Let's get to the random predictions!

1. Ricky Gervais is permanently declared "persona non grata" in the US after really offending America's sweetheart George Clooney at the Golden Globes. Too far, Ricky. Too far.

2. After deciding that Bradley Cooper just wasn't a ridiculous enough choice to play Eric Draven in 'The Crow' reboot, producers cast their gaze over to Tom Cruise.

3. Regis Philbin takes up permanent residence on 'Letterman,' serving as Dave's new trusty sidekick who can't remember guests' names. Katherine Heigl is momentarily humbled when Rege introduces her as 'Cathy Hay...Ha...Hig...All right, I don't know! I just don't know!'

4. Kim Kardashian tries to curry public favor by making a humanitarian trip to Haiti. (Wait, she already did that? And she was photographed extensively during her 'volunteer' efforts? While staying in a luxury hotel?)

5. Beyoncé and Jay-Z's baby becomes the youngest person to ever top the charts, releasing a #1 single at the tender age of two weeks.

6. Kevin James drops 100 pounds, and people don't know what to think of him anymore. He turns to Jonah Hill for career advice and workout tips.

7. Prince Harry sparks royal ire when he starts dating Lady Gaga. His family suspects Gaga of using Harry as a means to score a legit "Lady" title.

8. Oprah decides she wants her old show back, and quietly pays off Anderson Cooper to relinquish his daytime timeslot so she doesn't have any competition. She leans on Jay Leno for advice throughout the maneuver.

9. Russell Brand rebounds from his divorce from Katy Perry with Kate Moss. I know, I know -- Kate Moss just got married! But so did Brand, really. So, yeah. Touché.

10. Eddie Murphy proves that he really will do anything for his buddy Brett Ratner by agreeing to co-star in 'Rush Hour 4.' Oh, the humanity.

11. Andrew Garfield is arrested after scaling the wall surrounding Jim Carrey's house. He clearly wanted to send a message to Ace Ventura: Nobody publicly declares his love for Spider-Man's woman except Spider-Man! (Spider-Man's woman being, of course, Emma Stone.)

12. Jennifer Aniston marries Justin Theroux and immediately becomes pregnant. Baby is born wearing a fedora.

What did we miss? Got any random predictions for 2012?

[Photo: Getty Images/AP]

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2011 Oscar Bait: The Most Obvious Academy Award Suitors

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-12-22T15:00:00+00:00

Ah, mid-December -- a great time to catch quality flicks. As any movie buff knows, December is the prime time for studios to roll out their juiciest Oscar bait, so it's fresh in the minds of Academy voters in the new year. You're apt to find a lot of movies -- sorry, "films" -- that integrate plenty of classic Oscar bait like "true events," mental illness, period settings and quirky counter-cultural sentiments.

This year, almost all of the classic Oscar bait categories are covered. We have plenty of "real" characters, from J. Edgar Hoover to Margaret Thatcher to Marilyn Monroe. We have a 9-11 flick, 'Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close,' inspired by true events and starring two Oscar darlings: Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock.

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We also have a couple of quirky gems like 'Young Adult' and 'The Artist.' The former is the latest flick from Canadian director Jason Reitman, who at the tender age of 34 already has plenty of Academy accolades under his belt ('Juno,' 'Up in the Air'). 'The Artist,' on the other hand, is a silent film. You can't get more Academy-friendly than a silent film. It's a bold move to release such a thing, plus it's actually good. Such a feat likely won't go unrecognized.

Another good way to get the Academy's attention is by adapting an award-winning play ('Driving Miss Daisy,' anyone?). So 'Carnage,' based on the play 'God of Carnage,' already has that going for it. The fact that it's stacked with Oscar vets Jodie Foster, Kate Winslet, John C. Reilly and Christoph Waltz certainly won't hurt its Oscar appeal. 'Albert Nobbs' is also based on a classic play, and it stars frequent Oscar-nominee Glenn Close. It also has two other very important factors to its credit: it's a period piece, and Close portrays a woman living as a man. It really ticks all of the boxes, doesn't it?

Of course, one of the safest ways to land on the Academy's radar is to play someone battling an addiction or mental illness. Michael Fassbender nails his role as a sex addict in 'Shame.' Plus he does full-frontal nudity, which signifies a "brave" performance in the Academy's eyes. Keira Knightley received mixed reviews for her portrayal as the mentally ill Sabina Spielrein to Fassbender's Carl Jung in 'A Dangerous Method.' Whether people loved or hated her performance, though, the important thing is that people were talking about it.

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[Photos: Alliance Films/E1 Entertainment]

Scarlett Johansson 'Without Makeup' in 'We Bought a Zoo,' and Other De-Glammed Actresses

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-12-15T17:00:00+00:00

It's hard to imagine glamor-puss starlet Scarlett Johansson picking up kangaroo crap, isn't it? After all, audiences are conditioned to see her driving male co-stars wild with skin-tight leather suits and raspy whispers, not up to her knees in mud trying to keep a bunch of exotic animals happy.

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So, to help audiences wrap their heads around her role as a zookeeper in 'We Bought a Zoo,' Johansson was adamant about toning down her glam image. According to her recent Vanity Fair cover story, "Johansson was so determined to avoid looking like a movie star pretending to be a zookeeper running on empty and fueled only by her devotion to her motley assortment of big cats, zebras and kangaroos that she refused to wear makeup for the film."

An actress refusing to wear makeup is a bold move -- particularly in this era of up-close HD. Naturally, though, an actress's idea of 'no makeup' probably differs quite drastically from the average person's. It may mean forgoing cherry-red lipstick and mile-long false eyelashes, while still piling on a liberal dollop of foundation, powder, blush and everything else that makes an actress with superior genes look even more superior.

There was much written about Emma Stone's "makeunder" for summer blockbuster 'The Help.' But even with frizzy hair and muted makeup, Stone still looked pretty good. Same goes for Halle Berry in 'Monster's Ball.' Sure, she wasn't as radiant and perfect as she usually looks, but she was still quite obviously above-average in the looks department.

It's great when beautiful actresses actually get downright ugly for a role. Nicole Kidman in 'The Hours' and Charlize Theron in 'Monster' are the two most obvious examples. But they're not the only ones who've ugged it up for the big screen. To help you feel superior to Hollywood goddesses, if only for a moment, we've compiled a gallery of stunning actresses who dramatically transformed their looks for a role. (And Scarlett sans lipstick is in there, too, for good measure.)

[Photo: 20th Century Fox]

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Bursting at the Seams: 'New Year's Eve' and Other Movies With Too Many Stars

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-12-08T15:00:00+00:00

Sarah Jessica Parker. Ashton Kutcher. Halle Berry. Hilary Swank. Zac Efron. Robert De Niro. Jessica Biel. Katherine Heigl. Jon Bon Jovi. Sofia Vergara. Michelle Pfeiffer. What do all of these celebs have in common? They're all jammed into 'New Year's Eve,' the latest movie to stuff as many stars as humanly possible onto the screen.

This isn't the first time Hollywood has corralled a hefty helping of stars into one flick. It's a pretty safe strategy when it comes to luring people to the theaters; after all, there are plenty of folks out there to go to the movies to see, well, stars. And 'New Year's Eve' seems to have someone for everyone: Heigl and Bon Jovi for the rom-com fans, SJP for the moms, Lea Michele for the Gleeks and Efron for the teenage girls.

Unfortunately, too many stars can often come at the expense of a decent plot. Watching 'New Year's Eve,' for instance, feels a lot like watching clips from eight different movies all spliced together ... with the occasional overlap, of course. It also seems as though casting stars took priority over casting actors who were appropriate for the roles they were cast in. It's really tough to buy Lea Michele and Ashton Kutcher as an item -- no matter how cozy they've been acting together on the red carpets lately to promote this flick. 'New Year's Eve' features one other incredibly unbelievable pairing, but to tell you who the unlikely duo is would be giving too much away. As much as I hate unrealistic casting, I hate jerks who spoiler movies even more.

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Sometimes, however, having plenty of stars does work. Case in point: 'Ocean's Eleven.' The ensemble cast included Hollywood heavyweights like Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Matt Damon and Julia Roberts. But thanks to their great chemistry and a strong script, the star overload didn't detract from the movie. Every character had an important role to play in the script's overarching plotline: the heist. It didn't feel like any of the characters had extraneous scenes just to fit in more screen time for one of the megastars.

When the stars align and the celeb-studded movies work, it can be a beautiful thing. When it doesn't work, things can get pretty confusing with too many sub-plots going on to justify jamming all of those big names onto the poster. We've compiled a gallery highlighting some of the most memorable flicks that are bursting with stars in recent memory -- the good, the bad and the downright ugly.

[Photos: Warner Bros.]

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Charlize Theron vs. Julia Roberts as Evil Queens -- Who Wins?

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-12-01T16:00:00+00:00

Everyone's been buzzing about the two upcoming 'Snow White' flicks on the horizon, 'Snow White and the Huntsman' and 'Mirror, Mirror,' excitedly debating details like who will make the best heroine (Kristen Stewart or Lily Collins!) or the most dashing Prince Charming (Armie Hammer or Chris Hemsworth!) My favorite discussions, though, revolve around who will make the most deliciously evil queen: Julia Roberts or Charlize Theron.

Both actresses bring distinctive qualities to the table. Charlize excels at being downright terrifying, as evidenced by her role as serial killer Aileen Wuornos in 'Monster.' Julia, on the other hand, is a whole 'nother kind of frightening: her cutting remarks and disdainful glares could reduce any young girl to tears in the blink of an eye.

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My money's on Charlize in 'Snow White and the Huntsman.' Based on the "first look" photos of each of the queens, Charlize comes across as much more bad-ass. Her face says 'I'll cut you, bi**h. I'll kill you in your sleep!' Julia's face in 'Mirror, Mirror,' on the other hand, skews more towards the judge-y mother side. Instead of murderous thoughts, she looks like she's thinking, 'Go ahead, fatty. Have another tiny cucumber sandwich with the crust cut off. Mwhahahahaha! You disgust me.'

That said, I think both Julia and Charlize are excellent choices to play evil queens -- they'll each make their own distinctive marks in the evil fairy tale villainess hall of fame.

[Photo: Universal Pictures]

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Michael Fassbender: Everyman, Chameleon, Sex Symbol

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-11-24T15:00:00+00:00

That Michael Fassbender is quite the chameleon, isn't he? He's like a male Kate Winslet, seamlessly dashing between contemporary and old-timey roles. Few (if any) actors today are as versatile. From Spartan times to the swingin' '60s, it seems as though Fassbender has tackled almost every major movie-friendly era.

So it's no surprise that iconic director David Cronenberg cast Fassbender as Carl Jung in 'A Dangerous Method,' which hits theaters this week. Fassbender melts into his role as the conflicted psychiatrist struggling with his relationships with frosty mentor Sigmund Freud (Viggo Mortensen), unhinged patient/lover Sabina Spielrein (Keira Knightley) and his long-suffering wife, Emma (Sarah Gadon).

Fassbender clearly has the acting chops to pull off playing characters from a range of different eras. He also has the right look for it -- his face is just as believable in the WWII drama 'Band of Brothers' as it is in the 19th century epic 'Jane Eyre.' Hopefully he can resist the lure of Botox and facelifts that other Hollywood actors have succumbed to (cough, cough, Sylvester Stallone, cough, cough, Mickey Rourke). After all, facelifts just weren't done in the 19th century.

After seeing Fassbender decked out in early 20th century duds in 'A Dangerous Method,' we decided to wrangle up a gallery of his other memorable roles that highlight his incredible range - from a centuries-old warrior in Sparta to a modern-day New Yorker. Up next for Fassbender: something set in the future. (OK, not really. But we can dream! Imagine how cool Future Fassbender would look!)

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[Photo: Sony Pictures Classics]

Bella and Edward's 'Breaking Dawn' Mishap, and Other Movie Honeymoons Gone Awry

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-11-17T18:00:00+00:00

ZOMG, Bella and Edward are getting married! Their love has overcome all obstacles, and these two crazy kids (OK, one crazy kid and one sparkly old guy in a crazy kid's body) are finally gonna make the ultimate commitment in 'Breaking Dawn, Part 1.' To be followed, of course, by an extra-romantic super-sparkly honeymoon. Or not.

Yes, as everyone who's read the books knows, it's not exactly smooth sailing for Bella and Edward as they head off on their romantic retreat to the private island of Esme. Their starry-eyed honeymoon comes to an abrupt halt when Bella realizes there's a little monster kicking inside of her belly. That's right -- a little half-human, half-vampire bundle of joy. Since it's not your average fetus, Bella's pregnancy accelerates at a rapid rate, effectively serving as a major buzzkill for their honeymoon as Edward frets about the effects on Bella's body. They have to say goodbye to exotic Esme early and rush back to scenic Forks.

Bummer, huh? But theirs isn't the first movie honeymoon to go awry. In fact, movie honeymoons rarely go smoothly. Remember when Charlton Heston got totally sidetracked by work on his honeymoon in 'Touch of Evil'? It completely ruined their romantic getaway, and even put his lovely new bride (Janet Leigh) in danger!

Bella and Edward's preempted honeymoon got us thinking about other movie honeymoons that don't go as planned.

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It's 11-11-11: Movies That Made Numbers and Dates Terrifying

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-11-11T11:11:00+00:00

When you think about it, numbers are pretty darn scary. Remember how terrifying they were staring up at you from complicated math exams in school? Stupid numbers in stupid equations that just wouldn't solve themselves! Dates with significant numbers and sequences do a pretty good job of getting us all riled up. Case in point: The year 2000. Don't act like you didn't think about stockpiling food or building a panic room.

Some folks are worried about the ominous date 11-11-11. And, of course, there's a movie coming out to tap into our irrational fears. It's called - yep - '11-11-11.' So many ones! The horror! One is, ultimately, the scariest number of all since it ties into one of the most common human fears -- loneliness -- and we all know that one is the loneliest number.

With that in mind, it does seem possible that such a date - 11-11-11 - could hold some sort of significance, doesn't it? According to the movie's premise, '11-11-11' is when an entity from another world enters the earthly realm through Heaven's 11th gate. (OMG, another 11!) Bad things happen.

So if you weren't afraid of 11-11-11 before, you just might be now. Or, who knows -- maybe you're more wary of 12-12-12. Some people believe that'll be the end of the world. (Or December 21, 2012, depending on who you ask.) There's no shortage of numbers and dates to be afraid of, and there are plenty of flicks that do a great job of playing on our fears. There are five in particular that have made me forever associate certain dates or numbers with very bad things.

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Why We'll Never Get Sick of 'Harold & Kumar'

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-11-03T18:00:00+00:00

Shortly after its 2004 release, 'Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle' became an enduring cult classic. And, really, why not? Two stereotype-defying stoner dudes on a quest for tiny burgers is a pretty awesome concept. Plus, the original 'Harold & Kumar' gave us one of the best comebacks in recent history. That's right: NPH. Legen - wait for it - dary!

Kal Penn, John Cho and Neil Patrick Harris are back for more in the latest installment of the 'Harold & Kumar' saga, this week's 'A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas.' Yes, 3D. I'm not a fan of the 3D craze (and quite frankly, thought it would have fizzled out by now) but if Roldy and Kumar think we should see them blowing smoke rings in 3D, I'm not going to complain. Besides, the 3D certainly enhances the scene where Kenneth (Bobby Lee) gets egged by anti-Wall Street protesters.

The unlikely Christmas flick finds the estranged Harold and Kumar reluctantly embarking on a quest to replace Harold's father-in-law's perfect Christmas tree, which just happened to get burned down by a giant joint. It's not the most original plot, and it's not nearly as funny as 'White Castle,' yet my love of Harold and Kumar burns on. I'll probably even go see the fourth one. (Yes, there's going to be another one.)

I know I'm not alone in my unwavering love of Harold and Kumar, even though the follow-ups to 'White Castle' have been less than stellar. 'White Castle' was a comedic masterpiece, and thus I shall continue to support all subsequent efforts. It walked the fine line between low-brow comedy and smart social commentary, creating a mix that's oh-so-right.

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In addition to the gallery, we're also throwing in a list of the top five reasons Harold & Kumar have earned our devotion. (The adorable 'Waffle Bot' in the latest flick certainly doesn't hurt, either.)

1. They challenge cultural stereotypes. Ever notice how Asian actors are always stuck playing the nerdy shy guys who do nothing more than serve the muscle-y white heroes? If you hadn't noticed it before, you certainly would after seeing the opening scene of 'White Castle.' Way to call out Hollywood!

2. They gave us NPH riding a unicorn on the big screen. It doesn't get much better than that.

3. They take down bullies. Like those X-TREME! jerks in 'White Castle,' the Republican d-bag fiancé in 'Guantanamo Bay' and the Ukrainian mob boss in 'Christmas.' We can live out our revenge fantasies vicariously through Harold and Kumar.

4. They have run-ins with kindly hicks. Remember Freakshow from 'White Castle,' who fixed up their car? If you don't remember him, you probably remember his hot exhibitionist wife (Malin Akerman). In 'Guantanamo Bay,' a redneck hunter brings the guys home for a hot meal, where they meet his wife and inbred children. Ahh, backwoods rednecks.

5. They can turn menial tasks into crazy, epic adventures. A burger run has never been so entertaining. (Or a trip to an airplane bathroom or a quest to find the perfect Christmas tree, for that matter.)

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Obsession du Jour: 'Dragon Tattoo' Poster Craze and Other Amazing Movie Posters

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-10-29T11:00:00+00:00

Have you seen the posters for David Fincher's adaptation of 'The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo' yet? If not, what are you waiting for? One (my personal fave) features Rooney Mara's profile silhouetted across half of Daniel Craig's mug. The other, more scandalous, international poster shows a topless, pierced Mara with a grumpy-looking Craig embracing her from behind. And no, his hands aren't covering her naughty bits, a la Janet Jackson's iconic 1993 Rolling Stone cover. She is exposed.

Yet another version features Craig's silhouette lurking in Mara's puffy coif. The posters all play up Lisbeth Salander's signature look -- a look the world has become fascinated with. So fascinated, in fact, that H+M is set to roll out a Lisbeth-inspired line. Lisbeth would certainly not approve. Can you imagine her reaction to seeing hordes of trendy teens sporting her bad-ass threads? Mass-producing a counter-cultural look really defeats the point of it all, doesn't it?

The collective fascination with Lisbeth is undoubtedly contributing to the massive buzz surrounding the flick's December release. So far, the marketing efforts building up to the release have done a great job of keeping the momentum going. I must say, the red-band trailer that came out in the spring is one of the best trailers I've ever seen. Yes, ever. The cool posters are certainly doing their part, too.

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After all, everyone loves a cool movie poster. Just ask Drew Struzan. The prolific artist has made a very comfortable living creating some of the most memorable movie posters of our time, including work for 'Indiana Jones,' 'Back to the Future' 'Star Wars,' 'The Goonies' and even 'Cowboys & Aliens,' starring Daniel Craig. (Clearly, Mr. Craig has been no stranger to appearing on cool posters this year.)

Movie poster buffs will be pleased to learn that UK publisher Titan Books has just released a stunning collection called 'Oeuvre' featuring some of Struzan's greatest posters. It even includes a foreword by George Lucas, who shares some insightful observations about creating great movie posters: "Creating a memorable movie poster is always a difficult task. Developing poster art that stands on its own as a compelling piece of art can be nearly impossible, but Drew has helped Lucasfilm do just that for our movies."

Given all the fuss about the 'Dragon' posters, we thought now would be an excellent time to run a gallery celebrating a master of the movie poster realm, Struzan. You're welcome.

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Elizabeth Olsen and Other Stars Who Stepped Out of Their Siblings' Shadows

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-10-20T20:30:00+00:00

When Elizabeth Olsen started garnering buzz for her performance in 'Martha Marcy May Marlene,' a lot of people reacted with "There's another Olsen sister?'" In an age where being a famous person's sibling is almost a career in itself (yes, I'm looking at you, Khloe Kardashian. And you, Trace Cyrus. Et vous, Ali Lohan), it's almost astonishing that the world's most famous twin sisters, Ashley and Mary-Kate, have had an equally cute little sister hiding in the wings all these years.

Even more remarkable: Elizabeth can actually act. Instead of opportunistically riding her sisters' coattails into the family business, Elizabeth has been quietly honing her craft and leading a very private life. She's currently a theatre student at New York University, where she met 'Martha' director Sean Durkin, an NYU grad.

Her hard work appears to be paying off. She earned rave reviews from critics when 'Martha' debuted at Sundance. Next up, she'll co-star alongside Robert DeNiro and Sigourney Weaver in 'Red Lights,' directed by Rodrigo Cortes. Not bad for a newbie.

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Of course, Olsen isn't the first celebrity sibling to step out of a famous sibling's ever-looming shadows. While there are certainly more Khloes and Traces than there are Elizabeths, it's not completely unheard of for siblings to break through and prove themselves as worthy in their own right. In some cases, siblings on the back-burner even eclipse their trailblazing counterparts. With that in mind, here's a list of my top five favorite celebs who had to step out of their siblings' shadows.

Warren Beatty
It's hard to believe this legendary cool guy was ever in anyone's shadow. But when Shirley MacLaine is your sister, that's just how things are. As the story goes, little Warren thought he'd try his hand at acting after he saw how successful his big sister was becoming in Hollywood. Luckily, he had the chops to back his lofty aspirations, and another star in the Beatty family was born.

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Jason Bateman
Jason and his sister Justine are both acting vets, but during the height of the 'Family Ties' popularity in the '80s, Justine was definitely the bigger star. Remember when 'Teen Wolf Too' came out? I don't know about you, but for awhile I knew it as the movie starring the brother of Mallory from 'Family Ties.' Now, of course, the tables have turned, and Jason's star is shining bright. For now. (I smell a comeback, Mallory!)

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Maggie Gyllenhaal
While Maggie also appeared in the movie that shot brother Jake to fame, 'Donnie Darko,' she didn't land on people's radar until a year later, when she went fannying about the office with a deviant James Spader in 'Secretary.' While she hasn't quite achieved Jake's level of fame, Maggie is definitely a well-respected actress in her own right. She's courting controversy again in 'Hysteria,' about the invention of the ahem, vibrator.

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Kevin Dillon
How could I leave Johnny Drama off this list? He certainly knows a thing or two about living in someone's shadow, as the little brother of heartthrob Matt Dillon in real life, and the big bro to movie star Vinnie Chase on 'Entourage.' Kevin has definitely proven himself as a great comic actor on 'Entourage.' Here's hoping he can keep up his career's momentum now that the show is off the air.

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Elle Fanning
Those Fanning girls certainly are hard workers. At just 13, Elle has so many film and TV credits, you actually have to scroll down on her IMDB page to see them all. Dakota's little sister got her start playing a young Dakota in movies like 'I am Sam' and 'Taken,' She co-headlined this summer's thriller 'Super 8,' and appears next alongside Matt Damon and Scarlett Johansson in the much-buzzed-about 'We Bought a Zoo.'

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Why Staying Loyal to the Original Movie Might Save 'Footloose'

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-10-13T15:30:00+00:00

Sometimes remakes are a good idea. Case in point: Baz Luhrmann's stylized 1996 take on 'Romeo + Juliet.' The story has been told countless times before on both stage and screen, but Luhrmann masterfully brought something new to the table without compromising the integrity of the original story.

This elusive combination is tough to pull off, which is why we have so many sub-par remakes (Cough, cough -- 'Fame' -- cough, cough). This week marks the release of yet another remake. This time around, Hollywood is rolling out 'Footloose' without a side of Bacon. (Yes, I mean Kevin.) To do another 'Footloose' without Bacon on board just seems wrong.

Clearly, producers are hoping that 'Footloose' will tap into the current insatiable appetite audiences seem to have for all things dance. Just look at the undying popularity of shows like 'Dancing With the Stars,' and 'So You Think You Can Dance,' not to mention the inexplicably lucrative dance movie franchises like 'Step Up' and 'Save the Last Dance.'

While the original 'Footloose' opted to cast an actor in the starring role (the Bacon), the remake is taking a gamble on a professional dancer (Kenny Wormald). 'DWTS' alum Julianne Hough co-stars as the new Ariel, a.k.a. the preacher's daughter.

This move may serve as a bit of a red flag. The 'Fame' remake was widely criticized for being all sizzle, no steak. It had plenty of dazzling dance scenes, but lacked the emotional core that made the original 'Fame' such a classic. The fact that the new 'Footloose' features dancers rather than actors indicates it may be headed in the same direction.

That said, there's been plenty of buzz about the new 'Footloose' being incredibly loyal to the original. Who knows, maybe casting dancers in the main roles in a movie about passion for dancing is an inspired decision. We shall see. In the meantime, I've compiled a list of other remakes that stuck very, very close to the originals they were paying homage to -- with mixed results.

'Let Me In,' 2010 ('Let the Right One In,' 2008). While this is an excellent remake, it's so loyal to the original that it's quite obvious it was made purely to appeal to people too lazy to read subtitles. 'Let Me In' features all of the signature scenes the Swedish original did, including the cute Rubik's cube exchange, the hospital fire and, of course, the pool confrontation.

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'Psycho,' 1998 ('Psycho,' 1960). Gus Van Sant's remake may have been a little too faithful to Hitchcock's classic for some people's liking. It performed poorly at the box office, and critics asked what the point of the shot-by-shot remake was. The critical consensus seemed to be that, even though Van Sant's version was in color, it really didn't bring anything new to the table to make the endeavor worthwhile. Ouch.

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'Quarantine,' 2008 ('REC,' 2007). Like 'Let Me In,' this remake seems geared towards North Americans who don't like reading subtitles. 'Quarantine' is an incredibly faithful adaptation of the popular Spanish horror flick. It stars 'Dexter's Jennifer Carpenter as TV reporter Angela Vidal (they didn't even change the heroine's name from 'REC,' not that there's anything wrong with that) who's covering mysterious events at an apartment building as they unfold.

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'Arthur,' 2011 ('Arthur,' 1981). The contemporary Arthur, played by Russell Brand, is a smidge more politically correct than his '80s counterpart, embodied by Dudley Moore. While the plot is more or less the same, the changes the contemporary version did make made all the difference, and ultimately hurt the remake. The most glaring offense? Replacing Arthur's feisty, fun-loving gal (Liza Minnelli) with a boring goody-goody tour guide (Greta Gerwig). If modern Arthur had a formidable partner in crime, the remake may have done the original justice.

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'Freaky Friday,' 2003 ('Freaky Friday,' 1976). Who doesn't love a good body-swapping comedy? The most recent remake, featuring a pre-breakdown Lindsay Lohan, remained quite true to the 1976 version starring Jodie Foster. It integrated a few twists to keep things relevant to a 21st century audience, such as the additions of the battle of the bands and a bad-boy biker love interest played by teen heartthrob Chad Michael Murray.

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Stranger Than Fiction: 'Machine Gun Preacher' and Other Far-Fetched Plots Inspired by Reality

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-10-06T16:10:00+00:00

Stop me if you've heard this one before: a drug-dealing biker dude gets out of jail. He's reunited with his wife and daughter, but doesn't seem too interested in them. He gets back into the hard stuff, robs drug dealers at gunpoint and comes this close to murdering a hitchhiker with his bare hands. Fast-forward a few minutes, and all of a sudden biker dude has found God, completely reformed himself, and goes to Africa on a church mission. While in Africa, he wonders what's up in war-torn Sudan, and goes on a quick jaunt to check it out. On said jaunt, he decides he must build an orphanage there, pronto. And thus, 'Machine Gun Preacher' is born.

Sounds pretty far-fetched, doesn't it? But the outlandish plot of 'Machine Gun Preacher,' starring Gerard Butler in the title role, is actually based on a true story. Let me reiterate that. Sam Childers is a real guy, which completely discredits my theory that this concept came from one (intoxicated) guy saying "Hey, wouldn't it be crazy if Rambo went to Sudan to protect some orphans? Let's make a movie where that totally happens!"

I know it's a cliché to say that truth is stranger than fiction, but wow. Sam Childers has quite the life story, and he's not even 50 yet! He also has quite the handlebar mustache, which I'm disappointed Gerard Butler didn't sport in the movie.

While I was still reeling from learning that 'Machine Gun Preacher' wasn't based on some guy's acid trip, I got to thinking about other movies that I've been surprised to learn were based on true stories. And that brings me to this week's list: my top five movies that seem too weird to be inspired by true events.

'Catch Me if you Can.' Wait. This guy is real? Even though the real Frank Abagnale Jr. wasn't quite as dreamy as Leonardo DiCaprio, wow. He's the man! No wonder he completely bounced back after his stint in the big house (where he reportedly played mind games with the guards, who were all convinced he was a spy sent to report on prison conditions).

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'Psycho.' People had good reason to be haunted by that famous shower scene. Well, OK, that particular scene may have enjoyed the benefit of a little artistic license. But it's still super creepy to think that Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) was inspired by a real-life serial killer with mommy issues (Ed Gein).

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'Dead Ringers.' The idea of creepy twin gynecologists is unsettling enough. To find out this was inspired by a true story makes it, well, even creepier. (Shudder. Cringe. Shudder. Cringe.) Before Armie Hammer made the whole 'one-guy-playing-twins' thing cool in 'The Social Network,' Jeremy Irons mastered the role(s) of Elliott and Beverly Mantle, the weird 'Dead Ringers' twins who shared women (Again: shudder, cringe). This is loosely based on the lives of Stewart and Cyril Marcus, twin gynecologists who were both found dead due to drug withdrawal in their New York City apartment.

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'The Changeling.' This plot is so far-fetched, the movie probably wouldn't have even been green-lit if it wasn't based on a true story. Can you imagine this being pitched if it were fiction? "Hold on a minute. Her son goes missing. The cops give her some other kid and tell her it's her son. When she doesn't go along with it, they toss her in a mental institution?" Um, yeah. Pretty scary to think this actually happened.

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'Unstoppable.' Let me get this straight: runaway trains are real? And to think, I just thought it was just a cheesy metaphor popularized by Soul Asylum. I wonder if the real-life men who neutralized the "unmanned train situation" were as sassy as Denzel Washington and Chris Pine. (Or if the yardmaster was as attractive as Rosario Dawson, for that matter.)

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Laughing in the Face of Death: '50/50' and Other Terminal Illness Movies That Buck Convention

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-09-29T16:00:00+00:00

You'd think a movie about a young man battling a terminal disease would be a huge downer -- a la 'Dying Young' -- but '50/50' isn't your average death's door tearjerker. The funny new flick offers plenty of laughs along with the tender moments, and manages to find humor in an incredibly depressing situation.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt stars as Adam, a 27-year-old radio producer diagnosed with a rare form of cancer that has a 50/50 survival rate. (Hence the title.) His best friend Kyle (Seth Rogen) becomes Adam's rock, driving him to doctor's appointments and distracting him with nights on the town. Of course, this isn't the first time Rogen has played a character attending to someone facing a terminal disease. Remember 'Funny People'? Rogen dutifully tucked in Adam Sandler's ailing character each night. But I digress. Back to '50/50.'

It's refreshing to see a 'terminal illness' movie that isn't all about a doting woman nursing the patient back to health (cough, cough, 'Dying Young'), and ultimately leading into a sappy, sappy, sad, sappy love story.

After all, it's pretty easy for this particular genre to get schmaltzy. (Cough, cough, 'A Walk to Remember.') Sure: 'Terms of Endearment' is a great movie, but everything about it seems carefully calculated to extract tears.

If you're looking for something a little more subversive with plenty of inappropriate death-related jokes, you may want to try one of these instead. Behold, a list of my five favorite movies about people battling terminal illness. (Sorry, 'Last Holiday.' You didn't make the cut. While I like the premise of this Queen Latifah laugh-riot, the flick itself falls very, very short. And even though I give 'The Bucket List' credit for popularizing the phrase and tackling death in a fresh new way, watching Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman skydiving didn't quite make my top-5.)

'The Royal Tenenbaums.' Royal's stomach cancer may not be real, but I would still argue that this fits the 'terminal illness' genre because of how his alleged illness causes everyone around him to behave. Royal's fake cancer wins him a spot back in the family home, and garners attention from his estranged family. Sure, he gets caught. But he got in some much-needed face time with the family while the ruse lasted.

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'Igby Goes Down.' I realize it may be a bit of a spoiler to reveal who comes down with the terminal illness in this flick, so I won't. I will say that it made my list because of its refreshingly cynical approach to death. A lot of flicks present the dying person as some sort of flawless angel. Not this one. (Bonus points for featuring Bill Pullman AND Jeff Goldblum. Extra bonus points for seeing Kieran Culkin yell 'Sookie!!' to Claire Danes years before Bill and Eric made it all the rage on 'True Blood.')

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'Beaches.' OK, it's a little schmaltzy. But Bette Midler saves 'Beaches' from being too syrupy sweet. Her dying BFF of 30 years, Hillary, was kind of a rich bitch at times, but ultimately their friendship was able to stand up to betrayal, jealousy and even a bizarre love triangle. The Divine One gets to share Hillary's last moments with her at the beach. Like '50/50,' this is a touching story about friendship. Plus, it's the flick that brought us 'The Wind Beneath My Wings.'

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'Moulin Rouge.' It figures Satine (Nicole Kidman) would meet the man of her dreams (Ewan McGregor) just before falling ill with TB! (The old-timey disease is a good reminder that this super-stylized movie is indeed a period piece.) Even though there are plenty of professions of undying love, the singing, dancing and John Leguizamo keep 'Moulin Rouge' from being just another tragic love story.

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'My Life Without Me.' As if being diagnosed with a terminal illness at age 23 wasn't bad enough, Ann (Sarah Polley) also has a husband (Scott Speedman) and two kids. Damn! She embarks on her own bucket-listy journey, which includes some steamy encounters with Mark Ruffalo. Again, this one scores points for eschewing the whole dying-person-can-do-no-wrong trap.

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('50/50' image courtesy of Summit Entertainment)

Pop-Star Dads, Talented Daughters: Lily Collins and Other Rising-Star Actresses

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-09-22T15:00:00+00:00

Remember when rock stars produced supermodel children? Keith Richards spawned catwalk queens Theodora and Alexandra. Keith's bandmate Mick Jagger produced international supermodel Lizzy Jagger. This phenomenon extends beyond The Rolling Stones, believe it or not. Look no further than Duran Duran singer Simon Le Bon's daughter Amber as proof. It probably doesn't hurt that all of these children of rock stars had a little help from their mothers' genes -- their mamas are all supermodels.

But there's a new trend among daughters of famous musicians. Many of them are breaking into acting, and are doing quite well at it. Look at Lily Collins. Who'd have thought that "Another Day in Paradise" crooner Phil Collins would one day spawn Hollywood's latest It-Girl? You may remember her as Sandra Bullock's daughter in 'The Blind Side,' the role that first brought her into the spotlight.

Since then, she's won the coveted title role in 'Snow White' opposite Julia Roberts, and this week, you can catch her in 'Abduction,' an action thriller co-starring 'Twilight' hunk Taylor Lautner.

And she isn't the first daughter of a pop star to make a splash in Hollywood. With that in mind, here's a list of the top five actresses who have a famous musical dad (or granddad). I'm guessing model/artist/brooding teenager Frances Bean Cobain, daughter of Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love, won't be far behind.

Zoe Kravitz: There's no denying that Zoe won the gene pool lottery. It appears as though her ridiculously beautiful parents, actress Lisa Bonet and rock star Lenny Kravitz, passed along more than just good looks. The young Kravitz (and rumored girlfriend of Michael Fassbender) can sing and act (and model, obviously. I mean, look at her). She most recently appeared alongside Fassbender in X-Men: First Class.

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Rashida Jones: Quirky, funny, down-to-earth Rashida is nothing like what you may expect the daughter of a music tycoon as powerful as Quincy Jones to be. Maybe it's that endearing, relatable quality that has helped her movie career take off. She shone as Paul Rudd's cool fiancé in 'I Love You Man,' and she charms again as Zooey Deschanel's hipster-lawyer girlfriend in this summer's 'My Idiot Brother.'

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Liv Tyler: Who knew Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler's lips could actually look good on a woman? Lucky for Liv, Tyler's oversize features work incredibly well when balanced on her delicate face. Looks aside, Liv has proven time and again that she has the acting chops to back up her famous last name. My favorite Liv role to date? Corey the goody-goody with a secret in 'Empire Records.'

Riley Keough: It's pretty much impossible for Elvis Presley's granddaughter to have a normal life, isn't it? So it's probably for the best that Lisa Marie's daughter is embracing a life in the limelight, first as a model and now as an actress starring in flicks like 'The Runaways.' Up next? 'The Good Doctor' with Orlando Bloom.

Miley Cyrus: Say what you will about Miley, but she can actually act. After all, being the daughter of Achy Breaky crooner Billy Ray Cyrus doesn't exactly come along with the same privileges and connections as say, being Bruce and Demi's daughter would. Hanna Montana is probably still her best role, but she wasn't too bad exercising her dramatic muscles in 'The Last Song.' Her devoted fans will be able to catch her on the big screen again in the spring in 'LOL,' co-starring (coincidentally) Demi Moore.

In Honor of 'Straw Dogs,' 5 Other Movies You Might Not Realize Were Books First

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-09-15T20:00:00+00:00

We're all well aware that 'The Help' was a book before it became a blockbuster Emma Stone movie, but did you know that the upcoming Ryan Gosling flick 'Drive' was borne as a deliciously noir page-turner?

You may also be surprised to learn that this week's release 'Straw Dogs' isn't just a remake of the 1971 flick of the same name starring Dustin Hoffman. The story originated as a novel, the long out-of-print 'The Siege of Trencher's Farm' by Gordon Williams, originally published in 1969. Thanks to renewed interest in the story (due to the latest adaptation starring Alexander Skarsgard, Kate Bosworth and James Marsden), British publisher Titan Books is re-releasing the pensive thriller.

While the movie dials up the action, suspense and violence to create a nail-biting horror, the book employs more of a slow build that emphasizes the culture clash at play when an American professor moves into a farm next to an isolated community in northern England. The villagers are suspicious of the fancy American next door, and all hell breaks loose when he winds up reluctantly protecting an escaped child killer from the villagers thirsty for vigilante justice. The professor struggles with his staunch anti-violence stance while he tries to protect his family.

In the movie, on the other hand, the protagonist played by Marsden seems a little more capable of defending his family against a pack of angry irrational men than the book's meek, nerdy professor. This time around, our hero is a Hollywood screenwriter who accompanies his wife (Bosworth) back to her remote town in the deep South. The local hicks (including Skarsgard) don't take kindly to Mr. Hollywood.

While the movie is obviously inspired by the book, it does take a lot of liberties. The book's married couple certainly has their share of difficulties, but a sexy ex-boyfriend who looks like a Swedish god is not among them. Also, the book's mentally challenged little girl is a sexy teenager (Willa Holland of 'Gossip Girl') on the big screen. The book has more (possibly molested) sheep, too. Baaaa.

This year, the theatres have been teeming with film adaptations of high-profile best sellers, from 'Water for Elephants' and 'The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo' to the latest 'Twilight' and 'Harry Potter' installments. However, there has also been a healthy helping of flicks based on books that haven't been dominating book clubs, bestseller lists, tea parties and slumber soirees. Here are five 2011 releases you may be surprised to learn began as novels.

'Drive.' Based on 'Drive' by James Sallis. It's obvious why this slick thriller nabbed Hollywood's attention. It has all the elements of a big screen suspense, including an enigmatic hero, heists gone sour and amazing chase scenes. Throw in Ryan Gosling, Bryan Cranston, Carey Mulligan and Christina Hendricks and you've got yourself movie gold.

'Limitless.' Based on 'The Dark Fields' by Alan Glynn. A drug that turns you into a super-productive winning machine? Sign me up! The intriguing premise of Glynn's techno-thriller translated well onto the big screen, with Hollywood hot stuff Bradley Cooper tackling the starring role. Too bad the movie left out the part about the President also being doped up on MDT. Like 'Trencher's Farm,' 'The Dark Fields' was re-released to coincide with the 'Limitless' theatrical launch.

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'Unknown.' Based on 'Out of My Head' by Didier van Cauwelaert. Who knew the life of a botanist could be so full of intrigue? Liam Neeson does an excellent job playing van Cauwelaert's confused amnesiac protagonist. The filmmakers were wise to set the story at a conference in Berlin -- being away from home compounds our hero's disorientation.

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'The Thing.' Based on 'Who Goes There' by John W. Campbell Jr. This 1938 novella is often cited as one of the best sci-fi novellas ever written. The fact that a sci-fi story that's over 70 years old still resonates with audiences today more than speaks for itself. No wonder it's been adapted for the big screen so many times. Next up: the October release of 'The Thing,' a prequel to its 1982 predecessor of the same name.

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'The Eagle.' Based on 'The Eagle of the Ninth' by Rosemary Sutcliff. This historical adventure novel was ripe for Hollywood's picking. After all, old-timey epics about major quests have a history of performing well at the box office (cough, cough, 'Lord of the Rings'). Besides, parlaying the story into a film provided an excellent excuse for Jamie Bell to appear shirtless on the big screen.

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Hot Stuff: 'Bucky Larson' and Other 'Sexy' Boys on Film

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-09-08T15:00:00+00:00

There are plenty of movies about sexy ladies. Flicks about sexy men -- or men with sexy jobs, at least -- are a bit harder to come by. That's why it's so surprising to see two on the horizon: this week's 'Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star' and 'Magic Mike,' which is set to hit theaters next year.

The latter may be a bit more appealing to the ladies than the former. 'Magic Mike,' about a crew of male strippers, will feature hunky actors Channing Tatum, Alex Pettyfer, Joe Manganiello and Matthew McConaughey. (Finally, a movie where it will make sense for McConaughey to be shirtless!)

The flick is apparently based on Tatum's early days as a male dancer, but he won't be playing himself. That honor will go to Pettyfer. (No pressure or anything, playing a dude who's there watching your every move the whole time.) Tatum will reportedly be playing a more seasoned dancer who mentors the fresh meat.

'Bucky Larson,' on the other hand, stars the hilarious Nick Swardson ('30 Minutes or Less,' 'Grandma's Boy') as an aspiring porn star with tiny, um, equipment. Naïve young Bucky moves to Hollywood from the Midwest to follow in his parents' footsteps and pursue a career as a porn star. Even though he's ill-equipped for such a career choice, Bucky actually does achieve his goal thanks to his ability to make viewers feel more secure about their own package sizes.

While the goofy-looking Bucky may not be easy on the eyes, the flick co-stars handsome 'Miami Vice' vet Don Johnson as Miles Deep, and hunky bad boy Stephen Dorff as Dick Shadow.

It's about time Swardson was given a starring role. The seasoned actor is always a highlight in whatever he's in, from his role as the object of 'Partridge Family 'matriarch Shirley Jones' affections in the underrated 'Grandma's Boy' to his outlandish turn as Terry the troublemaker on 'Reno 911.'

In a nod to this week's debut of 'Bucky Larson' and 'Magic Mike' on the horizon, here's a look back at my own favorite movies about men who exploit their sexy sides. Oh, behave! (Sorry, Austin Powers -- you just missed the cut!)

Robert Carlyle and company in 'The Full Monty.' Yes, the steelworkers in 'The Full Monty' certainly had an edge over the Chippendales, all right. However, I'd have to say it had more to do with their sense of humor and camp factor than the fact that they take it all off. Also, cool hats.

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Richard Gere in 'American Gigolo.' Before he was the dream john in 'Pretty Woman,' Richard Gere was the dreamy young escort in 'American Gigolo.' And now he's a Buddhist. Talk about coming full circle!

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Mark Wahlberg in 'Boogie Nights.' Dirk Diggler certainly didn't have the same problem Bucky faces below the belt. Marky Mark took advantage of his sex symbol status to play the impressionable young Dirk in one of the most memorable performances of his career. A sexy shout-out should also be given to Burt Reynolds' mustache, which definitely upped this flick's sex-ay factor.

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Andy Dick in 'Old School.' In a movie full of outrageous moments, Dick's scene as the fellatio instructor giving a naughty lesson to the ladies takes the cake. Bananas everywhere, beware! Dick's intentions for the unsuspecting fruit are anything but pure.

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Rob Schneider in 'Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo.' Hmm, Adam Sandler seems to have a thing for movies about men with sexy jobs, huh? His company, Happy Madison, gave us Deuce Bigalow long before it rolled out 'Bucky Larson.' Not that I'm complaining. Hopefully Bucky's hapless adventures in porn will be as entertaining as Deuce's misguided foray into the escort business.

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When Animals Attack: 'Shark Night 3D' and Other Contemporary Horrors

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-09-01T17:15:00+00:00

Animals turning against us is a long-standing movie trope, and for good reason. It's a terrifying prospect! I'm personally more concerned about the day when robots inevitably turn against us, but hey, killer animals are always on the periphery of my paranoia, too.

With the proliferation of 3D, movies about animals gone bad have taken on a whole new dimension -- literally. I'm not a huge 3D fan myself, but I do have to admit that creatures popping off the screen can give horror flicks an edge when it comes to making audiences literally jump out of their seats.

This week, we'll get to see sharks getting all up in our grills in 'Shark Night 3D,' where a crew of unsuspecting young college co-eds are terrorized by a crew of various shark species. If you thought great whites were scary, wait until you see bull sharks coming at you, full steam ahead. ('Shark Night 3D' director David R. Ellis is no stranger to killer animals. He helmed the deliciously campy Samuel L. Jackson flick 'Snakes on a Plane' in 2006.)

Of course, some of the most terrifying movies of all time have featured killer animals out to get us. Thanks to 'Jaws,' it's almost impossible to leisurely float around in the ocean on a nice summer's day without subconsciously wondering when that menacing fin is going to start circling you. And don't even get me started on Hitchcock's 'The Birds.' As if crows and pigeons weren't annoying enough as it is, what with their fly-by poop-fests and all, now we have to worry that these ornithological menaces are going to rip us to shreds, too.

The most frightening fictional killer animal to me, though, has to be Cujo. Because Cujo doesn't start off bad. Cujo starts off as a beloved family pet, so you really don't see it coming when Cujo turns evil! At least when a shark starts circling you, you know it's time to panic. But when your carefree St. Bernard turns on you, that's got to be incredibly unsettling.

We've seen a resurgence of killer animal flicks recently, which got me thinking about my own contemporary favorites (and by contemporary, I mean over the last 15 years. Perhaps contemporary-ish is a more accurate description). Anyhow, here they are! From ferocious fish to sinister sheep, the campier, the better!

'Piranha 3D.' This remake really does have it all, including plenty of laughs, a healthy dose of 3D and a great cast featuring the likes of Elisabeth Shue, Adam Scott, Jerry O'Connell and even Richard Dreyfuss. Plus the ancient, flesh-hungry piranhas are truly frightening. This earned the #1 spot on my list based on the final scene alone. Best last scene ever!

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'Lake Placid.' Like 'Piranha 3D,' this gets points for a great cast. I mean, Bill Pullman, Bridget Fonda and Betty White? How much better does it get? It also boasts a 30-foot killer crocodile that Betty White may or may not be covering for. Who can blame her, though? You've got to align yourself with the strong!

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'Black Sheep.' No, not that 'Black Sheep.' You won't find Chris Farley or David Spade anywhere near this Kiwi flick about killer sheep. Killer sheep!!! Like 'Cujo,' this premise is extra-scary because of the surprise element. You really wouldn't expect cute, cuddly, gentle sheep to suddenly turn into blood-thirsty killing machines. This would be particularly terrifying in New Zealand, where the sheep-to-person ratio is a staggering 10-to-1.

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'Snakes on a Plane.' Ewww, snakes!! These slithery creatures are really the perfect movie villains. So deadly and so gross. Snakes attacking people on a claustrophobic plane is a stroke of genius, combining all kinds of fears for the ultimate horror culmination. Throw in Samuel L. Jackson, and you've got yourself a winner.

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'Eight Legged Freaks.' Stupid rabbit. Watch where you're going! Thanks to a clumsy little bunny that knocks over a barrel of toxic waste, a small town in Arizona suddenly has a slew of giant super spiders to deal with. Thanks a lot, Fluffy! 'Scream' veteran David Arquette leads the cast of this delightfully goofy scream-fest.

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Tom Cruise's Ladies, Past and Present: Oh, the Horror!

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-08-25T17:00:00+00:00

You rarely hear the phrase 'Tom Cruise sure has a type!' After all, at first glance, his bevy of past and present leading ladies (Katie Holmes, Penelope Cruz, Nicole Kidman and Mimi Rogers) appear to have very little in common. They're certainly attractive, but in very distinctive ways. We've got a teen queen, Spanish siren, regal redhead and a handsome older woman (I dare not say 'cougar,' because Mimi isn't that much older than Tommy).

But if you take a closer look at their resumes, you'll find that each of his ladies has appeared in at least one very memorable horror flick. This week, Katie's latest chiller 'Don't Be Afraid of the Dark' hits the big screen, reminding everyone that before channeling Jackie O in 'The Kennedys,' Katie came this close to being a bona fide scream queen. Maybe if 'Disturbing Behavior' or 'Teaching Mrs. Tingle' bled into sequels and trilogies she could have joined the ranks of Neve Campbell and Jamie Lee Curtis.

It's not just the horror connection that unites Tom's gals. The universe seems to draw them towards each other in a bizarre fashion -- either before or after being wooed by the larger-than-life Mr. Cruise. Just last year, Nicole and Penelope starred together in 'Nine,' as Daniel Day-Lewis' erratic lover and mysterious muse, respectively.

In a slightly creepier coincidence, Mimi Rogers guest-starred on Katie's 'Dawson's Creek,' playing the troubled mother of Jen (Michelle Williams) years before Katie became Tom's new gal. This little 'two-degrees-of-separation' moment reminds us all that yes, Tom is old enough to be Katie's daddy.

But I digress. Back to the original 'horrifying' connection. In honor of my totally random observation that Tom's ladies have all done notable horror flicks, I have taken the liberty of ranking my top five favorite horror films featuring a past or present Cruise companion.

1. Nicole Kidman as Grace Stewart in 'The Others.' You know things are getting out of hand when the ghosts make you attack your own daughter! Nicole is great in this psychological horror as the mother who questions her own sanity when 'the others' take over her house. Kidman was also great in 'The Stepford Wives,' which isn't technically a horror despite its horrifying premise that the wives are being transformed into obedient robots.

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2. Katie Holmes as Rachel Wagner in 'Disturbing Behavior.' Remember when Katie was strong-willed & sassy? She was a real firecracker in 'Disturbing Behavior,' where she tries to save her peers from being turned into Stepford-style drones. You can also catch her (pre-Tom) in 'The Gift,' where she plays a woman who mysteriously disappears. A tidbit for the fanboys: she's topless in this one -- another sign that Tom wasn't in the picture yet.

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3. Mimi Rogers as Pamela Fitzgerald (Ginger's mom) in 'Ginger Snaps.' It ain't easy raising teenage girls. Especially when one of them turns into a sex-crazed killer werewolf. Mimi is great as the clueless mom in this oft-underrated gem; her mantra of 'Girls will be girls!' seems a bit ineffective in the face of high school werewolfism.

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4. Penelope Cruz as Chloe Sava in 'Gothika.' Penelope is great at playing unhinged characters, and Chloe is certainly unhinged. But really, who wouldn't be with abusive ghosts on the prowl while you're on lockdown because everyone thinks you're crazy?

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5. Sofia Vergara as T. T. in 'Madea Goes to Jail.' Wait, this isn't a horror flick? Well, having to share a jail cell with sassy Madea could certainly be seen as a horrifying prospect by some, though Sofia's T.T. doesn't seem to mind. (Ed. Note: You may be wondering why sexy Sofia is on this list. No, it's not a mistake -- she was one of Tom's ladies. They dated briefly between Penelope and Katie.)

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The Hottest New Action Stars of 2011

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-08-18T17:00:00+00:00

Move over Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Statham and Jovovich. There's a new crop of hot young action stars muscling in on your territory.

Many of this year's most anticipated action flicks star established actors who are newcomers to the genre, like Ryan Reynolds in 'Green Lantern,' Seth Rogen as 'The Green Hornet' and James Franco in 'Rise of the Planet of the Apes.' Naturally, there are also a host of flicks starring tried-and-true action heroes, too, such as Jason Statham in 'The Mechanic' and Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford in 'Cowboys & Aliens.'

Others, like this week's release 'Conan the Barbarian,' feature relatively unknown actors carrying huge blockbuster hopefuls. You just have to take one look at 'Conan' star Jason Momoa to know he can pull it off, though. That man was built for action roles. Plus he's easy on the eyes, which certainly doesn't hurt.

2011 has been Momoa's year, leaving everyone (aside from 'Stargate' fans, of course) wondering just where this guy's been hiding for all of these years. He scored major buzz as the brutal Dothraki warrior Kal Drogo on 'Game of Thrones,' and now all eyes are on him again as he puts his own spin on the role made famous by the Governator in the early '80s. He should probably book a contemporary role pretty quickly, though, before he becomes stereotyped as an old-timey brute.

Momoa certainly holds his own in the goofy new 'Conan' flick. He grunts out his lines in an intimidating fashion, and he sure can wield that sword. He also has that rare combination of incredibly ripped bod and perfectly chiseled face, making him an action star who can appeal to both sexes. He's tough enough to impress the dudes, and more than handsome enough to entertain the ladies. As Zoolander might say, Momoa is 'really, really ridiculously good-looking.'

Momoa isn't the only newcomer the studios are taking a leap of faith for lately. Henry Cavill ('The Tudors') is our new Superman, and Garrett Hedlund ('Country Strong') got to headline the huge-budget 'Tron: Legacy' last winter. With so many hot new action stars bursting onto the scene, we thought it was time to compile a list of the top five most promising of the lot.

Jason Momoa. As mentioned above, just look at him. His beefy 6'3" frame is intimidating, to say the least. He clearly knows how to wield a sword. Plus he has that whole quiet bad-boy thing going for him, with that steely gaze and luxurious head of hair. With 'Game of Thrones' and 'Conan' under his belt now, we'll probably be seeing a lot more of Momoa in the future (not that I'm complaining).

Chris Hemsworth. 'Thor' has raked in hundreds of millions of dollars around the world already, which means Hemsworth is now officially a bankable international action star. He did the beloved Marvel franchise proud -- no easy feat. Next up is the highly anticipated 'Red Dawn' remake. If Hemsworth nails this one, too, he's golden.

Zoe Saldana. After 'Avatar,' we didn't hear much from Saldana for a while (unless you count her rather unremarkable role in 'Star Trek'). But that's all about to change with next week's release of 'Colombiana,' where she plays a badass Colombian assassin. With her character's tight little 'Lara Croft'-esque outfit and penchant for machine guns, 'Colombiana' will certainly make it clear that Saldana can hold her own against the big boys.

Andrew Garfield. The nerdy breakout star of 'The Social Network' isn't exactly the first person who comes to mind when you think 'action star.' But then again, neither is his 'Spiderman' predecessor Tobey Maguire. Garfield's winning combination of shy charisma and, well, lithe flexibility, just may make him the world's most endearing new action star.

Noomi Rapace. She blew everyone away as the iconic Swedish badass Lisbeth Salander in the original Millennium Trilogy movies. Now she's set to share the screen with Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law in the new 'Sherlock Holmes' flick this winter. With her impressive versatility, stunning good looks and action capabilities, Rapace is well on her way to becoming a bona fide movie star.

One to Watch: Weston Cage. I know, I know. Nicholas Cage's troubled son hasn't been in any actual movies yet. But that won't last long, with all of the buzz he's been generating with his public beat-downs and impromptu karate sessions for the paps. With a famous family that has tons of connections, it's really only a matter of time before Weston lands a role. ('Drive Angry 2,' perhaps?)

Pizza Delivery Guys on Film: They Just Don't Get No Respect

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-08-11T17:00:00+00:00

Pizza boys get no respect, huh? The latest long-suffering pizza boy to hit the big screen -- in this week's release '30 Minutes or Less' -- certainly isn't an exception. Jesse Eisenberg follows up his career-making turn as kid billionaire Mark Zuckerberg in 'The Social Network' with a role as a dirt-poor delivery guy named Nick who has to put up with constant flack about his job.

His sharp-tongued bestie/roomie Chet (the hilarious Aziz Ansari of 'Parks & Recreation') is particularly unforgiving about Nick's lack of career ambition. The fact that Chet and Nick are the same age and Chet just landed a full-time teaching gig really highlights Nick's stunted post-high school development.

But being a delivery guy isn't all bad. The pressure to deliver pies in 30 minutes or less has definitely helped Nick hone his stunt driving skills. He can deftly run red lights, squeak ahead of oncoming trains and dodge small children. His smooth skills behind the wheel come in super-handy when two buffoons (Danny McBride and Nick Swardson) strap a bomb across his chest and force him to rob a bank on their behalf.

Outrageous antics and over-the-top chase scenes ensue in this incredibly entertaining buddy comedy. It may not make sense the whole time, but with Ansari's sassy one-liners peppered throughout the mayhem, who really cares about logic? (Or the logistics of how all of this could go down, for that matter. If you find yourself wondering how two lazy dumbasses could concoct a deadly bomb with a code-activated locking system in a matter of minutes, stop. You're over-thinking things. Enjoy the ride.)

Eisenberg's Nick isn't the first movie pizza boy to entertain us on the big screen. In honor of this week's release of '30 Minutes or Less,' here are our top five favorite movie pizza guys.

Randy Bodek (Patrick Dempsey) in 'Loverboy.' While '30 Minutes' shows us that pizza delivery is a great way to sharpen your driving skills, 'Loverboy' demonstrates that it can also be an ideal segue into a lucrative career as a gigolo. Randy's extra-curricular 'Loverboy' activities help him score stylish clothes and other perks, all on a paltry pizza boy salary. Plus he gets to bed foxy cougars like Carrie Fisher, Kate Jackson and Kirstie Alley. Now that's some strategic multi-tasking.

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Mookie (Spike Lee) in 'Do the Right Thing.' The pizza business isn't all fun and games, as the tension at Sal's Famous Pizza proves. I probably should have done the right thing and given Mookie the top spot on this list, but McDreamy's Senor Pizza mustache really edged him up a notch (according to my completely unscientific judging criteria).

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Tucker, a.k.a. Norm, (Lee Evans) in 'There's Something About Mary.' See how underappreciated delivery guys are? Tucker, er, Norm, went to great lengths to create an architect alter-ego in his attempt to woo Mary. Huge mistake! Mary's actually pretty cool, Norm. She may have been down with your delivery boy status.

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Ricky Bobby (Will Ferrell) in Talladega Nights.' When you think about it, delivery guy is a pretty sweet fallback career for a race car driver. 30 minutes or less? No problem! Plus becoming a pizza jockey for Hugalo's ultimately led Ricky Bobby to his estranged father, Reese Bobby. Win-win.

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Pizza guy (Michelan Sisti) in 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.' This has got to be the world's most diligent pizza delivery guy. If I got an address that led me to a sewer, I'd just leave. If a penny-pinching talking turtle told me to slip the pizza into the sewer grate, I'd run away screaming. But not this pizza guy. No siree, nothing keeps him from gettin' the job done. He may be annoyed by the Turtles' penchant for underpaying, but if someone - or something - orders pizza, he delivers.

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Joe Pesci and Jeff Bridges? Annette Bening and Mickey Rourke? Fantasy 'Change-Ups' We Want to See

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-08-04T15:00:00+00:00

Another body-swapping comedy? Sweeeet! That's right, Hollywood paid attention to all the dough those 'Freaky Friday' flicks brought in, and is hoping a bro swap will prove to be just as magical at the box office as the classic mother-daughter switch.

This week's release, 'The Change-Up,' stars Jason Bateman and Ryan Reynolds as a settled daddy and a wild young bachelor, respectively, who wake up one morning to discover they've switched bodies. Uh oh! Hilarious antics are sure to ensue!

Olivia Wilde and Leslie Mann round out the cast as the hot co-worker and wifey. Hmm, Mann must really like the whole stuck-in-another-body concept. Remember her from '17 Again'? Y'know, the one where Matthew Perry wakes up in his younger body? And we're supposed to believe that Perry was as pretty as Zac Efron at some point? Yeah, that one.

My point is that body-swapping comedies are clearly quite viable at the box office. Sure, we'll have to wait until the end of the weekend to see what 'The Change-Up' pulls in, but I suspect it'll be pretty healthy. After all, the tried-and-true premise is amusing and it delivers an important 'grass is always greener' message.

It's promising to see the concept drifting away from family-friendly fare like 'Freaky Friday' and '17 Again.' Hopefully, if 'The Change-Up' does well, we'll see even more slightly risqué takes on the topic.

Until that happens, I've been day-dreaming about some impossible movie body swaps. Imagine if some of the most memorable characters in recent movie history suddenly woke up in each other's bodies? It could never happen (some of these aren't even from the same decade!) but it sure is fun to think about, isn't it? Here are my top five fantasy switches.

1. Carolyn Burnham (Annette Bening) from 'American Beauty' and Randy the Ram (Mickey Rourke) from 'The Wrestler.' Carolyn is all about keeping up appearances, so how would she react waking up in some dump in The Ram's dirty, disheveled body? What would people think?! Ultimately, though, I think Carolyn would roll with her new body and unleash all of her pent-up suburban housewife aggression through some serious physical violence. The Ram in Carolyn's body, on the other hand, would definitely miss some open houses and PTA meetings, but I predict Carolyn's husband Lester would actually prefer the Ram version of his estranged wife (wink, wink).

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2. Magda (Lin Shaye) from 'There's Something About Mary' and Powder (Sean Patrick Flanery) from 'Powder.' After years of painstakingly avoiding the sun, Powder would probably be pretty surprised to wake up in Magda's leathery, sun-worshipping body. Magda, in turn, would be beyond horrified to look in the mirror and see a pale albino face staring back at her. To the spray tanning bar, pronto!

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3. Nurse Ratched (Louise Fletcher) from 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' and Marge Gunderson (Frances McDormand) from 'Fargo.' Marge wouldn't stand for terrorizing the patients, would she? She would certainly be horrified to wake up in a body that everyone is terrified of. Picture what a different place the Salem State Hospital would be under Marge's rule instead of Ratched's. There certainly wouldn't be any lobotomies! You betcha! Salem's gain would be Brainerd's loss, though -- Ratched would most definitely abuse her powers as police chief if she woke up in Marge's body. I have a feeling she might prefer being a cop instead of a nurse, though.

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4. Nicky Santoro (Joe Pesci) from 'Casino' and The Dude (Jeff Bridges) from 'The Big Lebowski. Just imagine how Nicky would react to The Dude's BFF Walter (John Goodman). The fights would be epic! Nicky in The Dude's body would totally win. Heck, Nicky in Nicky's body would win by the sheer force of will alone. Everyone in Nicky's world, meanwhile, would be completely thrown off when the biggest spaz they know suddenly mellows out and becomes more interested in bowling than picking fights. [WARNING: The clip below features Nicky Santoro. So yeah, there are some f-bombs.]

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5. Neo (Keanu Reeves) from 'The Matrix' and Milton (Stephen Root) from 'Office Space.' If Milton thought getting moved to the basement was bad, just wait 'til he wakes up in an alternate reality! Sluggish Milton would probably struggle to keep up with Trinity and Morpheus, even if he had use of Neo's body. Restless Neo would surely hate the office. It takes more than a shiny red stapler to satisfy him! Plus he'd have to adjust to life as an ugly middle-aged loser.

Five '80s Classics We Want to See on the Smurfin' Big Screen

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-07-28T16:35:00+00:00

You'd be forgiven for feeling a bit of '80s nostalgia this summer. With 'The Smurfs' and 'Transformers' taking over the box office and 'Teen Wolf' on the tube, it'd be hard not to feel a little wistful for the Saturday morning cartoons of your youth.

There's certainly no shortage of classic '80s kids fare being remade into movies, some more successfully than others. 'The Chipmunks' flicks did the beloved franchise justice. The 'Garfield' movies, not so much. (How did that sequel get green-lit? Why did Bill Murray sign on for not one, but two 'Garfield' abominations? But I digress.)

There are even rumors floating around about live-action versions of 'Jem and the Holograms' and 'Thundercats.' I'm not going to pretend I wouldn't be all over a 'Jem' remake. I just hope the studios would treat my beloved Jem a little more carefully than, say, the live action 'Scooby Doo' movie starring Freddie Prinze, Jr. several years back. Remember that? Yeah, didn't think so.

Jen Yamato at Film.com recently shared her own casting choices for the 'Jem' flick, should it actually happen. Her fantasy Holograms included Zooey Deschanel, Lindsay Lohan, Jamie Chung and Rihanna, with Lady Gaga, Kristen Stewart, Christina Aguilera and M.I.A. rounding out The Misfits. While I don't agree with all of Yamato's choices (Deschanel and Stewart in particular), I do admire the well-thought rationale behind each decision.

My own choice for Jem would be Anna Faris. She's feisty, likable, funny and has demonstrated that she can play a pop star in 'Just Friends.' I have no idea if she can act, but Angelspit singer Amelia Tan (aka Destroyx) would definitely have a spot in my fantasy Misfits. She would make a totally badass Pizzazz. Eliza Dushku would be the perfect Roxy. And I'm totally on board with Yamato's Rihanna and M.I.A. picks.

But enough about 'Jem,' even though I could go on forever. With all of this '80s nostalgia in the air, why not go a bit further down this wistful path? Here are the top five '80s flashbacks I'd like to see on the big screen. Done well, please. No more hastily made embarrassments, a la 'Curious George' and 'Inspector Gadget.'

1. 'She-Ra', starring Emilia Clarke ('Game of Thrones'). I'm surprised a live action 'She-Ra' flick hasn't already been done. Maybe the studios were just waiting for the perfect actress to come along. If that's the case, I think the search is over. Clarke has been blowing everyone away as the Dothraki princess on 'GoT,' proving she's got the perfect range of tough and vulnerable to do 'She-Ra' justice and battle the evil forces of Hordak.

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2. 'Punky Brewster', starring Hailee Steinfeld ('True Grit') and Richard Dreyfuss ('What About Bob?'). The 'Punky' premise seems even more far-fetched in today's over-protective day and age, doesn't it? No social worker would ever allow an abandoned child to live with the weird old guy who owns the vacant apartment she's been squatting in! Realistic or not, though, it's still a great premise with plenty of potential for a big-screen adaptation.

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3. 'My Pet Monster,' starring Nolan Gould ('Modern Family'). What kid wouldn't want a cute-yet-tough little monster to have his back? Maybe the live-action movie adaptation could carry an anti-bullying message. Bullies would certainly think twice before picking on a kid if they knew he had a monster friend ready to mop the floor with anyone who messes with his master.

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4. 'ALF,' starring Larry David ('Curb Your Enthusiasm) as ALF's new best friend. ALF and Larry would totally hit it off, dontcha think? They both hate people and aren't afraid to tell it like it is. They could go on a mission as "social assassins" for hire, pointing out annoying habits on behalf of people too afraid to do so themselves. Perhaps along the way they offend the wrong person (a mob boss?) and have to go on the run. Hilarious road trip antics could ensue.

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5. 'Popples,' starring Rico Rodriguez ('Modern Family'). Rodriguez is great as the neat-freak Manny on 'Modern Family,' and he'd be perfect for a 'Popples' flick. Can't you just see him freaking out as the Popples mess up his room and get toothpaste all over the bathroom? Maybe the plot could revolve around how the Popples help a tightly wound kid become slightly less neurotic, learn to enjoy life and, well, be a kid.

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'Friends With Benefits': When Sex and Friendship Collide on Film

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-07-21T18:00:00+00:00

There's no escaping the concept of friends with benefits (FWB) these days. It has even inspired two big releases this year: 'No Strings Attached,' starring a 'Black Swan' diva and a former teen heartthrob, and 'Friends With Benefits,' starring, well, a 'Black Swan' diva and a former teen heartthrob.

The latter hits theaters this week, with Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis playing the FWBs in question. The two gravitate towards each other after they're dumped by their respective mates (Emma Stone and Andy Samberg). Neither wants a big commitment after being burned, so they make a pact to treat sex like it's no bigger deal than a friendly game of tennis.

The two flicks certainly have more similarities than differences, but 'Friends' does a better job of establishing the friendship aspect of the FWB arrangement. Kunis and Timberlake's characters joke around, play video games and actually seem to enjoy each other's company out of the sack.

'Friends With Benefits' has two key things 'No Strings Attached' doesn't: Woody Harrelson and Patricia Clarkson. Harrelson is hilarious as Timberlake's gay jock co-worker who's not afraid to dish out very blunt advice, and Clarkson also shines as Kunis' kooky mom.

Of course, 'Friends With Benefits' and 'No Strings Attached' aren't the first to explore what happens when you mix sex and friendship. While we have FWBs on the brain, here's a list of my own top five favorite movie friends who blur the line between friends and lovers.

1. Harry and Sally (Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan) in 'When Harry Met Sally.' Forget the benefits. This movie raised the question 'Can men and women ever be just friends?' While Harry and Sally don't have a FWB arrangement, they do rely on each other for a lot of couple-y things, like dinner companionship and late-night phone calls. When they do hook up it's really more of an 'oops' than a concerted decision to throw sex into the friendship, but I would still argue that Harry and Sally are the ultimate movie friends with benefits.

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2. Ennis and Jack (Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal) in 'Brokeback Mountain.' Their wives reckoned they were just friends. But Ennis and Jack certainly enjoyed a lot of benefits on those fishing trips. The two men shared a lot of similar interests, which made them the ultimate friends with benefits. Fishing, cowboy stuff and sex? What a great deal! Too bad love had to get in the way of this otherwise pretty sweet arrangement. Someone always wants more!

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3. Lelaina and Troy (Winona Ryder and Ethan Hawke) in 'Reality Bites.' Much like Harry and Sally, Lelaina and Troy's initial hook-up was more of an 'oops' than a plan. Instead of parlaying it into a formal FWB situation, the two try to pretend it didn't happen and ignore their attraction to each other. A FWB arrangement would have been convenient since they lived together. Though, I suppose, living together would probably make it more difficult to avoid getting emotionally attached. They give in to their attraction in the end, bypassing the FWB stage in favor of a full-blown relationship. Typical!

4. Matthew, Isabelle and Theo (Michael Pitt, Eva Green and Louis Garrel) in 'The Dreamers.' Matthew totally scored. He not only got to hook up with the super-hot Isabelle, he also got a great place to stay in Paris. Too bad her brother Theo is always trying to horn in on the action. Oh well, they're all friends. With benefits. Am I the only one thinking of the 'Three Best Friends' song Zach Galifianakis sang in 'The Hangover' right now?

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5. Steve and Linda (Campbell Scott and Kyra Sedgwick) in 'Singles.' In the '90s, before we had terms like FWB, people just tried to 'keep things casual.' (Ah, '90s cool. Nostalgia alert!) Steve and Linda hit it off, but they don't want to get too serious. When they try to be just friends, their mutual attraction escalates things pretty quickly. They're hot, they're cold, they're hot. Clearly, this casual thing just doesn't work out sometimes.

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-- 'Friends with Benefits' photo by David Giesbrecht

5 British Actors We Would Have Loved in 'Harry Potter'

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-07-14T13:15:00+00:00

Bill Nighy once famously complained of being the only English actor who hadn't been cast in a 'Harry Potter' film. Luckily for him (and us!), he was offered the role of Minister of Magic Rufus Scrimgeour shortly after.

Though it certainly seems like every high-profile British actor from Emma Thompson to Helena Bonham Carter to Alan Rickman to Gary Oldman has appeared in the franchise at some point, there are still a significant number of seasoned Brits who haven't dabbled in the 'Harry Potter' magic. (Vanity Fair even compiled a list of 76 venerable British stars missing from the films.)

Some absences are less mysterious than others. While most thespians would kill for a spot in the films, others have said they wouldn't be caught dead in the wizarding world of 'Harry Potter.' Most notably, Tilda Swinton has publicly declared her distaste for the 'Harry Potter' films, reportedly complaining that the franchise "fetishizes boarding school for children." (Sounds like someone didn't have fun rubbing elbows with Princess Diana at the West Heath Girls' School.) Of course, most stars would not echo Swinton's sentiments. As Nighy once told Premiere magazine, "'Harry Potter' is an institution in England. It has become a national cultural treasure."

As many were clamoring for a spot in the films, others were trying to sort out scheduling conflicts. Case in point: Hugh Grant was apparently set to play Gilderoy Lockhart (which ultimately went to Kenneth Branagh), but had to back out due to other obligations -- it's still unknown whether he has any regrets.

We probably wouldn't change a thing about the existing 'Harry Potter' movies. They were beautifully crafted and incredibly well-acted. That said, it's always fun to play the "what if" game, isn't it? Especially on the day before the release of 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2.' So in that spirit, what if these five (10, if you count the hypothetical understudies) British acting legends were cast in some of the saga's most memorable roles?

Jeremy Irons would have been perfect as Professor Snape. In fact, we get a glimpse of what could have been in the Comic Relief 'Harry Potter' parody below, where Irons spoofs Snape. Irons was reportedly in talks to appear in one of the films, but he wouldn't reveal any specifics. What a tease!

Understudy: Tim Roth, who apparently read for the role.

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Kate Winslet would have made a fascinating Bellatrix Lestrange. It was rumored that she was set to play French hottie Fleur Delacour in 'Goblet of Fire,' but scheduling conflicts may have kept that from coming to fruition. Winslet is good in whatever she tackles, which is why we really would have liked to see her unique spin on the eeeevil Bellatrix.

Understudy: Kristen Scott Thomas. Wouldn't it be great for her to let loose after playing so many tightly-wound English ladies?

Ian McShane would have nailed the role of Sirius Black. Sirius is hardened and world-weary, not unlike McShane's iconic character Al Swearengen on 'Deadwood.' Plus McShane is kind of a badass, so we could definitely see him sparring with his evil cousin Bellatrix.

Understudy: Christian Bale. Though, upon further consideration, he probably shouldn't be working with so many children given his penchant for on-set outbursts.

Daniel Day-Lewis would have been great as Lucius Malfoy. He's already got the 'horrible father' character down pat (ahem, 'There Will Be Blood'). And yes, we would have loved to see him with long, blond hair.

Understudy: Paul Bettany. He has that creepy albino look going for him.

Judi Dench would have been perfect as the 'evil in pink' Dolores Umbridge. It would have been fun to see Dench taking orders from her evil overlords as Umbridge, after seeing her play the boss so often as M in the 'James Bond' flicks.

Understudy: Helen Mirren. She demonstrated her aptitude for playing an evil teacher in 'Teaching Mrs. Tingle.'

(Photos supplied by Getty Images)

Charlie Day Brings the Crazy to 'Horrible Bosses,' and Other Movie Wildcards

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-07-07T19:00:00+00:00

Every so often, an actor comes along who has a knack for playing excitable wildcards prone to random outbursts, outrageous comments and even the occasional temper tantrum.

Charlie Day is one of those actors. This week, we get to see the talented 'It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia' star on the big screen in 'Horrible Bosses,' playing Jennifer Aniston's assistant/prey named Dale. Aniston's naughty character will do anything to get into innocent little Dale's pants, including semi-nude meetings and a constant barrage of inappropriate come-ons. Fed up with the non-stop harassment, Dale makes a pact with his equally disgruntled best buds (Jason Bateman and Jason Sudekis) to kill all three of their bosses. (Kevin Spacey and Colin Farrell are both hilarious as the other two bosses from hell.)

Day has accumulated a loyal fan base during his stint on 'Sunny' as the loveable screw-up Charlie Kelly. Charlie is the wildcard that every gang or group needs (along with "Looks" and a "Brain"). And what a wildcard he is -- you never know when Charlie's gonna bust out his Green Man suit, huff some glue, snort some coke or scrawl in his dream journal. He's so crazy, he might even write and produce a musical!

Thanks to Charlie's expert delivery, many of his lines have become oft-quoted classics along the lines of Jason Alexander's "George is getting angry!!" scene from 'Seinfeld.' Some of Charlie's most memorable outbursts include "We're gonna go America all over their asses!"; "Wild card, bitches! Yeeeeeehaaaaaaw!" and, of course, "Oh, get a job? Just get a job? Why don't I strap on my job helmet and squeeze down into a job cannon and fire off into job land, where jobs grow on little jobbies?!"

In honor of Charlie Day's first starring role in a big budget Hollywood flick, here's a list of my top five favorite movie wildcards of all time. (Including Charlie's 'Sunny' roomie/bedmate, Danny DeVito! Who Charlie gives a shout-out to in 'Horrible Bosses'!)

1. Joe Pesci as Nicky Santoro in 'Casino.' You really don't want to mess with any of Pesci's characters. Ever. He may be small, but I'd rather step on Arnold Schwarzenegger's toe than Joe Pesci's. Pesci is the ultimate movie wildcard, ready to explode at any given moment. He's amazing in 'Goodfellas' and 'JFK' too, but if I have to single out one performance it'd be Nicky Santoro because he's just such an incredible badass. He's banned from casinos, goes rogue on his mobster bosses and even has sex with DeNiro's estranged wife, played by Sharon Stone. Wildcard jackpot!

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2. Danny Devito as Sam Stone in 'Ruthless People.' Who messes with wrong numbers like that? Sam Stone, that's who. Bonus points for doing it while sitting with a cop. (Click here to see the clip, it's too racy to embed here.) DeVito is the master when it comes to playing mischievous little weirdos. Maybe that's why he and Charlie Day are such an awesome duo on 'Sunny.'

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3. John Goodman as Walter Sobchak in 'The Big Lebowski.' Temper, temper, Walter! Walter is the loosest of loose cannons. He's happily bowling one minute, bragging about his ability to secure severed toes (with nail polish) the next, then plotting to scam crazy nihilist kidnappers later on. What's with this guy? He's gonna get The Dude killed!

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4. Chris Tucker as James Carter in 'Rush Hour.' Patience is definitely not one of Detective Carter's strong points. He's constantly berating Lee (Jackie Chan) with patronizing outbursts like, "Do you understand the words that are comin' outta my mouth?" Clearly, a bromance is on the horizon. (For more ridiculous, zany Tucker roles, you need look no further than 'The Fifth Element' or 'Friday,' where that high-pitched voice and bizarre vocab feature prominently.)

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5. Donald Duck in 'Cured Duck.' We know, random. But oh so wildcard-y. How does Donald manage to keep hottie Daisy with a temper like that? Anger management courses, that's how. Daisy ain't gonna put up with him blowing a fuse and tearing up her lovely living room every time he can't open a window! Luckily for us, angry Donald returns in future productions. Because really, who wants to watch a calm Donald Duck?

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Larry Crowne's Midlife Crisis Is Nothing Compared to These Other Movie Meltdowns

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-06-30T17:00:00+00:00

Wheee! Scooters are fun! This midlife crisis thing ain't so bad.

Instead of chasing young tail and bandying about in leathers on a newly purchased motorcycle, Larry Crowne (Tom Hanks) is handling his midlife crisis by enrolling in community college and squiring/escorting teacher Mercedes Tainot (Julia Roberts) around town on his cool blue Vespa in this week's release 'Larry Crowne.' (Before we continue, can we stop for a moment to examine the name Mercedes Tainot? Seriously? Who came up with that one? But I digress.)

Larry Crowne's crisis begins when he's canned from his retail job for not having a college education. After he's unable to land another retail gig, he decides to give college, well, the ol' college try. Upon arriving at the school, he's inexplicably cajoled by the dean into taking a class on the art of casual conversation. Because, sure, that's gonna help him become more marketable in a cut-throat job market. But whatever. It's taught by pretty Mrs. Tainot, so Larry Crowne is happy.

He's also happy because his sweet new scooter helped him land some cool new friends, like a pretty young coed who's just dying to give him and his house a makeover.

Surly Mrs. Tainot happens to be going through a mid-life crisis of her own. She's losing her zest for teaching, and has become unable to tolerate her husband (Bryan Cranston). He's written a couple of books and appears to coast on his book money, but the fact that he lacks ambition and fills his days admiring bikini pics online infuriates the Mrs. to no end.

'Larry Crowne' certainly isn't going to find itself listed among movies that truly capture the agony and confusion of going through a midlife crisis. If you're looking for something with a bit more meat that's a smidge more relatable, you may want to try one of these midlife-themed gems.

1. Lester Burnham (Kevin Spacey) in 'American Beauty.' Oh, Lester! Fantasizing about your daughter's nubile young friend is kind of creepy. But who can blame him? His wife (Annette Bening) is ice cold, and quite obviously having an affair with that annoying guy named Buddy (Peter "Eyebrows" Gallagher). Lester's bizarre journey is truly fascinating as he tries to figure out his life and his career as his marriage deteriorates and his children no longer need him.

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2. Steve Zissou (Bill Murray) in 'The Life Aquatic.' After his BFF is killed by a Jaguar Shark, Zissou begins to question everything about his own life and makes it his mission to hunt down and kill the evil beast. Along the way he does fatherly stuff with the man who may or may not be his long-lost son (Owen Wilson), pursues a much-younger reporter (Cate Blanchett), and rescues his nemesis (Jeff Goldblum). Obviously, rescuing a nemesis is a key life moment! The journey changes Zissou, which helps him win back his wife's (Anjelica Huston) affection.

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3. Miles Raymond (Paul Giamatti) in 'Sideways.' Can you say pathetic? Miles steals money from his mother, drunk dials the ex-wife he's still in love with and remains an unpublished author. Time to start examining some life choices!

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4. Jules Allgood (Julianne Moore) in 'The Kids are All Right.' Her kids are getting older and her wife (Annette Bening, once again) is on her case about getting a real job. As if that wasn't enough, now the kids' biological father (Mark Ruffalo) is in the picture, and he happens to be super foxy and waaay into her. What's a forty-something woman to do? Crisis time!

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5. Grady Tripp (Michael Douglas) in 'Wonder Boys.' Is this what happens when men peak too young? Professor Tripp's third wife has just left him, and he seems to be gravitating back towards women closer to his own age (he even ignores advances by Katie Holmes!). That's not necessarily such a great thing, though, when he knocks up his married boss (Frances McDormand).

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Best Bad Teachers in Movies

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-06-23T16:00:00+00:00

It's hard to imagine Cameron Diaz playing a teacher. That is, until you hear the teacher is rude, crude, lewd and hot for Justin Timberlake, which sounds more aligned with the roles we're used to seeing the goofy, action-loving actress tackle.

'Bad Teacher' hits theaters this week, and features Diaz as, well, basically the complete opposite of the passionate Ms. Johnson (Michelle Pfeiffer) in 'Dangerous Minds.' Diaz's Ms. Halsey is more interested in chasing the cute (and rich) new substitute, played by Timberlake, than she is in developing young minds.

Lucy Punch ('Dinner for Schmucks') plays Diaz's biggest rival for JT's affections, while Jason Segel ('Forgetting Sarah Marshall') co-stars as a gym teacher who wouldn't mind a piece of Ms. Halsey for himself. Diaz's greedy character will do anything to land JT as her latest sugar daddy, including saving up for a boob job to help catch his eye.

There are plenty of naughty educators in movies over the years, but Diaz's Ms. Halsey just may take the cake for worst movie teacher ever. (Aside from those really, really evil movie teachers and nuns who beat the kids, of course.) She doesn't mean well, and she's not tough on the kids for their own good. She's tough on them because, well, she's a ... rhymes with 'witch.'

In honor of 'Bad Teacher,' here's a list of my own top five favorite best worst movie teachers.

1. Jim McAllister (Matthew Broderick) in 'Election.' Mr. McAllister is a total mess! Sure, Tracy Flick (Reese Witherspoon) is the most irritating character ever. But tampering with a school election is just plain wrong, Mr. McAllister. Tsk, tsk. A man who lets a teenage girl get under his skin that much really shouldn't be a high school teacher. (Bonus points for having Broderick come full circle from driving Principal Rooney crazy in 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off.')

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2. Mrs. Tingle (Helen Mirren) in 'Teaching Mrs. Tingle.' What kind of teacher messes with Katie Holmes's perfect GPA? An evil one, obviously. Clearly Mrs. Tingle is just jealous of perfect little Katie. She'll pay for her spiteful bias, oh yes. She'll pay.

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3. Professor Snape (Alan Rickman) in 'Harry Potter.' I mean, really, how could we leave Snape off this list? Would it kill him to be a little less snarky? Heading off to boarding school isn't easy for poor Harry, and having a sharp-tongued professor who blatantly favors your snotty white-blond antagonist certainly doesn't help.

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4. Principal Rooney (Jeffrey Jones) in 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off.' Much like Mr. McAllister let Tracy Flick get under his skin, Principal Rooney let Ferris (Matthew Broderick) drive him batty. Resorting to breaking and entering a student's home is not a hallmark of a respectable educator. Maybe it's time to just let that snot-nosed punk leave your cheese out in the wind, Mr. Rooney.

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5. Sheba Hart (Cate Blanchett) in 'Notes on a Scandal.' You really shouldn't sleep with high school boys, Sheba! Especially if a) he's your student; b) you're married; and c) the creepy old history teacher (Judi Dench) is trying to blackmail you into loving her.

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His Best Roles: Ryan Reynolds

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-06-16T17:00:00+00:00

It may have taken a while, but it looks like Ryan Reynolds has elevated his status from Canada's favorite sharp-witted pretty boy to bona fide Hollywood movie star. The former Mr. Alanis is headlining a major summer blockbuster, 'Green Lantern,' and he reportedly beat out some pretty stiff competition to land the role.

The 'Green Lantern' coup followed the surprise smash hit 'The Proposal,' where Reynolds proved he could co-headline a rom-com with the likes of industry heavyweight Sandra Bullock. Looks like Ry-Rey has mastered all of the genres that count at the box office, from frat-boy comedies to action flicks to rom-coms.

It's hard to think of another young actor who translates across genres so well. At one point I probably would have said James Franco could give Ry-Rey a run for his money, but he just may have worn out his welcome by trying to be a little too versatile. (More stoner flicks, less film school, Franco!)

Reynolds has already proven that he's no flash in the pan. He's been steadily working for decades now. (And he's only 34!) Plus, he's demonstrated that he won't let Hollywood starlets and heartbreak (ahem, ScarJo) distract him from his work. And even while his personal life was crashing and burning, Ry-Rey didn't have a Sheen-style public meltdown. (Though it would have been fun to see him have some sort of run-in with Sean Penn, wouldn't it?)

I've always been quite partial to Mr. Reynolds, as far back as his 'Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place' days. I'm not among the legions of ladies swooning over his beefy build and carefully tousled bedhead, but I've always found his knack for quick banter amusing -- especially when he's playing smarmy douchebags.

While we're contemplating his rise to the big leagues, why not take a more detailed walk down memory lane? Here are my top five favorite Ryan Reynolds roles to date. (And no, I didn't forget about 'Buried.' He certainly gets an A for effort for that one, but it's not on my list of faves.)

1. Van Wilder in 'National Lampoon's Van Wilder'
Oh, Van Wilder. What a scamp! Reynolds is perfect as the girlfriend-stealing, prank-loving big man on campus. His barb-trading scenes with frat boy rival Richard (Dean Cosgrove) are just super. No wonder he's in the Guinness Book of World Records as the raddest dude alive!

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2. Monty in 'Waiting'
Ry-Rey is both engaging and appalling at the same time as he chases underage tail, frightens young birthday boys, cheers on the Penis Showing Game and secretly exacts justice upon rude, rude customers. Some of the best scenes are when he fights with his ex, Serena (Anna Faris). Reynolds and Faris are so good together, especially when they're at each other's throats. No wonder they teamed up again for 'Just Friends.'

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3. Mike in 'Adventureland'
Reynolds is truly skilled at playing cocky douchebags, which is why his portrayal of skeezy Mike is near the top of my list. Mike's a loser (not to mention married!), but he's got game. Poor little James (Jesse Eisenberg) could stand to learn a thing or two.

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4. Andrew Paxton in 'The Proposal'
This time around, Sandra Bullock gets to play the jerk! Reynolds holds his own as the conflicted nice guy, and proves he's got what it takes to woo larger-than-life Sandy on the big screen. Not to mention the fantastic chemistry the pair has -- it was enough to lead to speculation about the two being 'together.'

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5. Wade Wilson in 'X-Men Origins: Wolverine'
It's easy to see why they expanded Reynolds' role after he was cast. His expertly delivered wisecracks provide welcome comic relief in this intense tale about the misunderstood mutant.

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Kids + the Paranormal = Movie Gold

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-06-09T15:00:00+00:00

Ever notice that paranormal activity and kids have a way of finding each other in a lot of movies? Take this week's release 'Super 8,' for instance. The sci-fi thriller directed by J.J. Abrams features spooky things happening around a small town in Ohio following a mysterious train accident caught on film by a group of kids.

The kids suspect something weird about the train crash and begin investigating. Meanwhile, people in their town start disappearing and all of the dogs inexplicably run away. As the kids (played by Elle Fanning and newcomer Joel Courtney, among others) are trying to figure out what may or may not have escaped from the train, the local deputy (Kyle Chandler, 'Friday Night Lights') begins his own quest for the truth.

The kids are the primary characters while adults take on secondary roles, a la popular '80s Amblin Entertainment flicks like 'The Goonies' and 'E.T.' The Amblin vibe is no accident: 'Super 8' is an Amblin co-production, along with Abrams' Bad Robot Productions.

It's been awhile since we've had a solid, kid-centric adventure film that's not a kids' movie. Sure, it could certainly be argued that 'Harry Potter' fits the "kids having wacky adventures" bill, but we would argue that the 'Harry Potter' movies are kids movies at heart that just happen to also be popular with adults. 'Super 8,' on the other hand, is a movie for adults that just happens to star kids.

While we're on the subject of children and the paranormal, here's a list of five great movies featuring that timeless combo of kids and supernatural phenomena.

Warning: Some spoilers ahead!

1. 'E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial'
Who says paranormal stuff has to be creepy? When he finds E.T., Elliott (Henry Thomas) gains the coolest friend/pet ever. Not only is E.T. an awesome alien that loves Reese's Pieces, but he and Elliott also share a psychic connection. Super rad!

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2. 'The Exorcist'
Whatever force is compelling sweet Regan (Linda Blair) to pee on the floor during classy cocktail parties and swivel her head like there's no tomorrow certainly isn't of this world. Perhaps the explanation lies somewhere between science ... and superstition!

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3. 'The Others'
When her weird photosensitive kids start to claim they're seeing ghosts, Grace (Nicole Kidman) doesn't believe them at first. Of course not -- they're silly little children with outrageous imaginations, right? OK, maybe not. Grace eventually begins to realize that her kids aren't just spewing nonsense. Like her servant lady says, sometimes the world of the dead gets mixed up in the world of the living.

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4. 'The Sixth Sense'
Yeah, kid, we get it. You see dead people. If only his psychiatrist (Bruce Willis) was a little quicker on the uptake, he may have realized a whole lot sooner that young Cole (Haley Joel Osment) wasn't delusional, and figured out that hey, maybe he's actually dead himself. Because really, how could he have survived being shot at reasonably close range by Marky Mark's big brother? This brings us to an important moral of many of these paranormal flicks starring kids: don't be so quick to dismiss children as overly imaginative. Sometimes they really are interacting with ghosts, aliens and evil spirits.

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5. 'Poltergeist'
When the Freeling household is overtaken by a poltergeist intrusion, it's little Carol Anne (Heather O'Rourke) who notices it first. The unknown entity sucks her into a portal the following night, much to the dismay of her mother (JoBeth Williams, who later in the movie apparently doesn't have time to put on pants) and father (Craig 'Coach' T. Nelson). Downright creepy and genuinely frightening, Carol Anne became the prototype for filmdom's scariest kids.

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Jay Baruchel Gets Creepy in 'Good Neighbors,' and 5 Other Creeps Next Door

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-06-02T17:00:00+00:00

If you can't trust squeaky-clean boy-next-door Jay Baruchel, who can you trust? Canada's favorite export stars as an overly friendly new neighbor in a Montreal 'hood that's being terrorized by a serial killer in 'Good Neighbors.' The eponymous neighbors, played by Scott Speedman ('Barney's Version') and Emily Hampshire ('The Trotsky'), are a little on edge and aren't sure quite what to make of their peppy new neighbor.

Likewise, Baruchel's character Victor doesn't fully trust the slightly creepy Spencer (Speedman), who may or may not be confined to a wheelchair, and suspects that Louise (Hampshire) may have some secrets of her own. So yeah, this serial killer really isn't doing much for promoting a sense of community and 'love thy neighbor' vibes.

Creepy neighbors are a classic movie staple. (And TV, too. Remember Wilson from 'Home Improvement'? Why wouldn't that guy ever show his face? What's he hiding?) Sometimes the creepy movie neighbors turn out to be kind of heroic a-holes, like Clint Eastwood in 'Gran Torino.'

But more often than not the creepy neighbor turns out to be bad news. Like Col. Frank Fitts (Chris Cooper) in 'American Beauty.' What was that guy's deal? And the Langs (Tim Robbins and Joan Cusack) in 'Arlington Road.' Not only were they bad news, but they also made Jeff Bridges look crazy when he was right about them all along! Jerks.

The list of memorable bad movie neighbors is long, but I've managed to narrow it down to my own top five favorites. These people aren't just wacky and annoying, Kramer-style. These bad neighbors are eeeeeevil! Eeeevil!

SPOILER ALERT: Don't read on if you don't want to know the ending of any of these flicks.

1. Roman and Minnie Castevet (Sidney Blackmer and Ruth Gordon) in 'Rosemary's Baby.' It doesn't get much worse than the Castevets. They're not only meddlesome, intrusive and incredibly annoying, but also deranged Satan-worshippers who drug Rosemary and impregnate her with Satan's spawn! And they even managed to get her husband on board for the whole thing. WTF!

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2. Lars Thorwald (Raymond Burr) in 'Rear Window.' Sure, Jeff (Jimmy Stewart) was being kind of creepy himself by spying on Thorwald. But Thorwald totally deserved it! That guy was out of control -- killing his wife and snapping the neck of a poor defenseless neighborhood dog. Who does that? What a psycho.

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3. Abel Turner (Samuel L. Jackson) in 'Lakeview Terrace.' Somebody doesn't like interracial couples! Racist cop Abel starts off somewhat hostile and annoying, with little passive-aggressive snipes here and there. But then he reveals himself as a full-blown psycho, terrorizing neighbors Chris and Lisa (Patrick Wilson and Kerry Washington). Since he's a veteran cop, there's not much they can do about him ... until it's almost too late!

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4. Charlie Meadows (John Goodman) in 'Barton Fink.' Just when lonely writer Barton (John Turturro) starts warming to his boisterous neighbor Charlie, Barton's mistress is murdered right in his own bed! Charlie is suspiciously good at getting rid of the body, not to mention surprisingly eager. Hmm. Just Barton's luck, huh? His only friend in town turns out to be a psychotic serial killer.

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5. Creedence Lenore Gielgud (Deborah Reed) in 'Troll 2.' Sure, Creedence gives off some major witch vibes at first, but she does offer the hungry teenager food, so how bad could she be? Unfortunately for the hungry teenager, Creedence turns out to be a cannibalistic vegetarian goblin queen who's plying him with magical green paste that will turn him into a plant so she can eat him. The rest of the residents of Nilbog are equally bad neighbors, trying to force weird green paste on tourists to make them nice and tasty. Bad for tourism, guys. Who's gonna want to visit Nilbog now?

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'Good Neighbors' opens in Canada on June 3 and in the US in July.

Our Favorite Scenes From 'The Hangover'

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-05-26T16:00:00+00:00

So, have you seen it yet? 'The Hangover Part II' opened Wednesday night, presumably to satiate eager superfans who just couldn't wait for a traditional Friday release. The original 'Hangover' is the highest-grossing R-rated comedy ever, so yeah, expectations for the sequel are pretty high.

This time around, the guys head to Thailand for Stu's (Ed Helms) wedding. Despite Stu's attempts to keep the days leading up to his wedding as low-key as possible, he, Phil (Bradley Cooper) and Alan (Zach Galifianakis) wind up blacking out again and waking up in the squalor of a seedy Bangkok hotel. Instead of losing Doug (Justin Bartha), the guys lose Stu's future brother-in-law Teddy (Mason Lee), a 16-year-old medical prodigy.

The central plot of 'The Hangover 2' is essentially the same as the original: The guys have a crazy night, lose someone and struggle to piece together what happened the night before -- all in the final hours leading up to someone's wedding.

Warning: Foul Language Ahead!

The sequel won't win any points for originality, but it is fun to see our three unlikely heroes reunited. Even Mr. Chow (Ken Jeong) is back! Mr. Chow may have been the biggest scene-stealer in the original, but this time around that honor belongs to a vest-wearing, drug-dealing, chain-smoking monkey.

Some of the elements that made 'The Hangover' so amazing are revisited in the sequel, like Mr. Chow's tiny genitalia, Alan's knack for delivering ridiculous-yet-hilarious speeches, a kidnapping scare and even a stress-induced song by Stu.

While our minds remain clouded by fond 'Hangover' memories, how's about we extend this trip down memory lane with a list? After careful consideration and many, many viewings, here are our top five favorite scenes from 'The Hangover.'

"Is This Hotel Pager-Friendly?"
Oh, Alan. You don't impress pretty hotel clerks by flashing antiquated technology. Then again, maybe he really did just want to know why he wasn't getting a 'sig.' Perhaps the ghost of the "Real Caesar" had something to do with it.

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"Are You Ready to Let the Dogs Out?"
I'm not sure what's funnier about this scene -- Alan's outfit (tight white pants with a tucked-in gray T-shirt and a jaunty man-purse), or his deadpan delivery of "Are you guys ready to let the dogs out?"

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Alan's 'Wolf Pack' Speech
It's probably pretty obvious by now that we think Alan is the best 'Hangover' character (we're hardly alone, there, we know), but really, it would be a crime to leave out this scene. Alan's ridiculous-yet-touching wolf pack speech has made its way into wedding toasts around the world.

"At the Corner of Get a Map and F*ck Off"
This has to be one of the best lines ever. We're willing to bet it resonated with a lot of real-life Vegas residents whose lives have been interrupted by one too many drunken tourist looking for detailed directions.

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The Doug Song
What a random scene. Stu goes from freaking out about the tiger in the bathroom to singing a sweet tune for poor, lost Doug. Our favorite part is definitely the Doug montage. Second-favorite part? 'What do tigers dream of, when they take a little tiger snooze?'

Awesome Scenes Too Risqué to Post Here:

A naked Mr. Chow escapes from the trunk and kicks everyone's asses
Alan finds Stu's camera and the guys get to see what they got up to the night before. All of the living Vegas icons are there, from Wayne Newton to Mike Tyson to (shudder) Carrot Top!

What are your favorite 'Hangover' scenes?

Why So Serious? When Funnymen (Like Rainn Wilson) Take a Dramatic Turn

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-05-19T16:00:00+00:00

Rainn Wilson can do so much more than just comedy. Want proof? The actor (best known for playing the militant nerd Dwight Schrute on 'The Office') is garnering buzz for his role as a pill-popping, emotionally unavailable father in 'Hesher.'

The film premiered at Sundance over a year ago, and is just now starting to creep into theaters across North America in limited release. It stars Joseph Gordon-Levitt ('Inception,' '(500) Days of Summer') as the titular character, a moody metalhead who befriends T.J. (Devin Brochu, 'Ghosts of Girlfriends Past'), a young boy being raised by his grieving father Paul (Wilson) following the death of his mother.

Hesher's questionable mentorship of T.J. sparks the concern of a local grocery clerk played by Natalie Portman, who steps in to shield the young boy from Hesher's negative influence. As Hesher and T.J. spend more time together, Paul falls into a deeper funk on his mother's couch. (Yes, he lives with his mother.)

Wilson is undeniably skilled at playing troubled losers. Dwight Schrute is (or was, in earlier seasons) one of the funniest characters in recent television history. Wilson was also great as a lovable loser in 'The Rocker,' a not-so-lovable loser in 'Juno,' and a weirdo loser on 'Six Feet Under.' It's no surprise he's transitioning his formidable skills into drama now.

Audiences are often skeptical of comedic actors who try to reinvent themselves as serious dramatic actors. It's no easy feat. (Just ask Ben Stiller, who is still trying to get people to take him seriously even after 'Greenberg,' or Adam Sandler, who quickly returned to comedies after 'Punch Drunk Love.')

Wilson may have the chops to pull it off, though. Here's hoping his dramatic turn in 'Hesher' paves the way for more serious roles for him. I, for one, think he would make an excellent serial killer. And not just a cartoonish slasher-flick serial killer -- a complex, multifaceted serial killer like Hannibal Lecter.

Of course, the transition from comedy to drama has been successfully done before. Just look at Will Smith, who made the unlikely leap from 'Fresh Prince' to one of the biggest box office draws in the world. With that in mind, here's a list of my top five favorite dramatic performances by comedic actors. Share yours in the comments section!

Tom Hanks in 'Catch Me If You Can'
Thought I was gonna say 'Philadelphia,' didn't you? Well, this list is about my own favorite dramatic performances, and Tom Hanks was amazing as the uppity Carl Hanratty, who wouldn't rest till he got his man. Hanks has proven himself as both a master comedian and a skillful dramatic actor. He's at the point in his career where he could announce that he's playing an obnoxious, deaf, mute gigolo with a gift for music and nobody would question whether he could pull it off.

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John Leguizamo in 'Summer of Sam'
Leguizamo has worked hard to avoid being pigeonholed as the funny guy, and his efforts have paid off. He's known for his memorable roles in everything from 'Carlito's Way' to 'Romeo + Juliet' to 'Moulin Rouge,' but my personal favorite dramatic Leguizamo performance is his take on Vinny in 'Summer of Sam.' He's just so good as the womanizer paranoid about getting offed by the serial killer terrorizing the 'hood.

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Mo'Nique in 'Precious'
Remember Mo'Nique in 'Beerfest'? Probably not. Her Oscar-winning, heart-wrenching performance as the mother from hell in 'Precious' has transformed perceptions of Mo'Nique so much that it's easy to forget she got her start in comedy. I don't even really like Mo'Nique, but I think it would be a huge oversight to exclude her from a list such as this. And there's no denying that she was amazing in 'Precious.'

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Bill Murray in 'Broken Flowers'
When did the goofy guy from 'Caddyshack' get so good at playing brooding men facing some sort of life crisis? Murray garnered attention for his dramatic skills with 'Rushmore' and later in 'Lost in Translation,' but his turn as the prickly aging playboy Don Johnston is my favorite "serious Bill" role. Extra points for the amazing car music during the driving scenes (even though Murray probably didn't have anything to do with that).

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Woody Harrelson in 'Natural Born Killers'
Wow. Maybe sweet Woody from 'Cheers' ain't so sweet after all. Harrelson shocked 'Cheers' fans when he totally nailed the role of psycho killer Mickey in the now-cult-classic Oliver Stone flick. Since then, Harrelson has demonstrated again and again that he is truly one of the most versatile actors in Hollywood, mastering diverse roles in flicks like 'Kingpin,' 'The People vs. Larry Flynt' and, more recently, 'Defendor.'

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"Opposite" honorable mention: John C. Reilly, who transitioned from a serious Oscar-nominated actor in films like 'Chicago' and 'Magnolia' to the super-hilarious star of contemporary comedy classics like 'Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story,' 'Talladega Nights' and 'Step Brothers.'

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Women Can Be Funny Too: 'Bridesmaids' and Other Hilarious Female Roles

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-05-12T17:00:00+00:00

Finally, an outrageous gross-out comedy starring women! Hollywood isn't exactly known for producing flicks that maximize funny females. Even Bette Midler has lamented the lack of funny women gracing the big screen lately.

That could explain why so many women are eagerly anticipating this week's release of 'Bridesmaids,' which has been described as 'The Hangover' starring women. SNL's Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph lead the cast, with Rose Byrne ('Get Him to the Greek'), Ellie Kemper ('The Office'), Wendi McLendon-Covey ('Reno 911') and Melissa McCarthy ('Mike & Molly') rounding out the rest of the bridesmaids.

As they gear up for their friend's wedding, these bridesmaids don't just primp, preen, gossip and tut-tut about what their men might be up to at the bachelor party. Instead, they embark on their own crazy adventures, including excessive drinking, cursing, farting, burping and ogling hot men.

It's telling that this Judd Apatow-produced flick is generating so much buzz based purely on the fact that it features funny women being funny. Why is this so rare? How did this happen? We're used to seeing funny women supporting funny men on the big screen. Or playing the funny-yet-toned-down-to-appeal-to-the-mainstream friend in rom-coms (like Wanda Sykes in 'Monster in Law' or Mindy Kaling in 'No Strings Attached').

TV shows, meanwhile, are brimming with funny ladies in funny roles. Just look at Jane Krakowski as the shallow diva Jenna on '30 Rock,' Kaitlin Olson as the impossibly self-absorbed Sweet Dee on 'It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia,' or Amy Poehler as the goofily earnest Leslie Knope on 'Parks & Recreation.' And, yes, Tina Fey kills it each week as Liz Lemon on '30 Rock.'

If 'Bridesmaids' is a box office hit, maybe it will pave the way for studios to green-light more movies that maximize the abundance of funny female talent out there today. While we're on the subject of funny women in film, here are my own picks for the top five funniest scene-stealing actresses working today. Humor is highly subjective, so everyone's list is probably going to be different -- share yours in the comments section!

1. Anna Faris As Samantha in 'Just Friends'
Faris completely stole this movie. Without her, it would have been a total rom-com snoozefest. Her outrageous portrayal of a spoiled, bratty, horny pop star was hugely entertaining and, quite frankly, I'm surprised it didn't inspire a Samantha James spin-off flick, a la the Aldous Snow / Russell Brand vehicle 'Get Him to the Greek.'

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2. Jane Lynch As Paula in 'The 40 Year Old Virgin'
Jane Lynch is amazing in whatever she's in, but her role as Steve Carell's raunchy, sex-crazed boss is one of her most memorable. She'll haunt your dreams!

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3. Amy Poehler As Angie in 'Baby Mama'
Remember when she peed in the sink? Of course you do! Poehler delivered plenty of memorable moments in this flick, co-starring fellow funny lady Tina Fey, but the sink scene definitely takes the cake.

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4. Isla Fisher As Gloria in 'The Wedding Crashers'
Stage five clinger alert! Fisher's breakthrough performance even outshone her established funny-man co-stars, Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson. It's time for her to start taking on some more laugh-out-loud roles like this one, and less middle-of-the-road rom-coms like 'Definitely Maybe' and 'Confessions of a Shopaholic.'

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5. Kristen Schaal As Stewardess Stacey in 'The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard'
This flick started out strong and then fizzled out fast. Maybe they should have given Schaal a bigger role, because her precious minutes were some of the movie's funniest. No wonder they put most of her scene in the trailer! Her funniest role to date is undoubtedly as the loveable stalker Mel on 'Flight of the Conchords.' Here's hoping we get to see a lot more of her on the big screen (in roles that maximize her zany comedic talent).

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Honorable Mentions: Betty White for being totally awesome in 'The Proposal,' and Lucy Punch as Darla in 'Dinner for Schmucks.' Punch is pitch-perfect as Paul Rudd's completely unhinged stalker.

Roles We Want to See Kate Hudson Play

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-05-05T16:30:00+00:00

Kate Hudson and romantic comedies, like this week's 'Something Borrowed,' go together like peanut butter and jelly. Her flicks have even been used as a punch line on '30 Rock,' when Tracy explains he did a movie with notorious North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il because it was either that or a role in a Kate Hudson movie.

It hasn't always been this way. Remember when young Kate first burst onto the scene as the unforgettable Penny Lane in 'Almost Famous'? Everyone was all atwitter, proclaiming that she had what it took to follow in her famous mother's footsteps.

Mama Goldie Hawn made her mark as a versatile funny lady in classics like 'Overboard,' 'Death Becomes Her' and 'The First Wives Club'; she also scooped up an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress in 'Cactus Flower' and landed a nom for Best Actress for 1980's 'Private Benjamin.'

When Kate garnered an Oscar nomination for 'Almost Famous' a decade ago, she appeared to be well on her way towards a career as illustrious and fulfilling as her mother's. But then, instead of following up her critically acclaimed role with another meaty endeavor, she took on a slew of rom-coms, from 'How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days,' to 'You, Me and Dupree' to 'Fool's Gold.' (Hmm, is Matthew McConaughey her kryptonite?)

Sure, Hudson has stepped outside of her comfort zone a few times, most notably in Rob Marshall's star-studded musical flop 'Nine.' But what happened to that raw talent we saw in 'Almost Famous'? Kate undeniably has what it takes to be a versatile, enduring actress, not unlike Sandra Bullock or even her mother. She just needs to stop phoning it in on an endless parade of romantic comedies.

'Something Borrowed' is a start, kind of. Yes, it is another rom-com, but Kate's not playing the sweet girl next door this time. And we're not all supposed to root for her this time. (Ginnifer Goodwin gets to play the heroine this time around.) So while Kate is pushing her boundaries a tad, here's a list of the top five types of roles we'd like to see her take on next. Because we know she can do it.

Psycho Killer, a la Sharon Stone in 'Basic Instinct'
Wouldn't it be awesome seeing bubbly Kate taking on an evil character? She could reel 'em in with her sweet, innocent face, and then BAM! Victims wouldn't know what hit them.

Fun-Loving Action Hero, a la Cameron Diaz in 'Charlie's Angels'
Kate's got enough pep and sass to pull off a role like this. Plus, she seems pretty sporty.

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Tortured Artist, a la Salma Hayek in 'Frida'
We saw her worshiping the artists in 'Almost Famous.' Why not play an artist herself? Seeing Kate take on a brooding role could go a long ways towards digging her out of the rom-com pigeonhole.

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Conflicted Mob Wife, a la Diane Keaton in 'The Godfather'
Or better yet, conflicted mob girlfriend, a la Drea de Matteo in 'The Sopranos.' We would love to see Kate decked out in loud mob-gal attire. Think hoop earrings, halter-tops, fishnets. Kate pulled off hippie chic in 'Almost Famous'; surely she could do the same with mafia stylin'.

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Brazen Bank Robber, a la Faye Dunaway in 'Bonnie and Clyde'
Oh wait. Hilary Duff just wrapped a 'Bonnie and Clyde' remake. Hilary Duff? WTF?

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Top 10 Most Memorable High School Movie Nerds

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-04-28T17:00:00+00:00

This week marks the release of Disney's 'Prom,' just in time for -- you guessed it -- prom season. It's hard to resist a solid high school movie, and this one appears to have all of the classic elements: a brooding bad boy (Thomas McDonell), a pretty blonde overachiever (Aimee Teegarden), a beautiful prom queen (Kylie Bunbury), a popular jock (De'Vaughn Nixon) and, of course, a nerdy nice guy (Nicholas Braun).

No high school movie would be complete without a nerdy nice guy (not to be confused with abrasive geeks, like Napoleon Dynamite or 'Rushmore''s Max Fischer). After all, lovable dorks have become some of the most memorable characters in high school movie history.

It's hard to pinpoint why nerdy nice guys have become such an enduring high school movie fixture. Maybe it's because they're so relatable. Maybe it's because the screenplay writers are dorks themselves. It could also be attributed to the underdog factor. Everyone wants to see the nerd rise from obscurity to get the girl!

Or it could be that lovable dorks may be a necessary device to teach us all a lesson. Y'know, a lesson about not being distracted by the dazzling good looks of popular jocks or brooding bad boys who turn out to be jerks. Besides, if high school movies have taught us anything, it's that sometimes nerdy nice guys grow up to be hunks like Joseph Gordon-Levitt or McDreamy.

In honor of 'Prom''s latest nerdy nice guy, here's a list of my top 10 all-time favorite lovable high school movie dorks. Did I miss yours? Let us know in the comments box!

1. Duckie (Jon Cryer) in 'Pretty in Pink'
Duckie saves the day! No girl wants to walk into the prom solo, and Duckie makes sure his BFF Andie (Molly Ringwald) doesn't have to. His good deed doesn't go unnoticed, and this nice guy finishes with a dance from pre-'Buffy' hottie Kristy Swanson.

2. Lloyd Dobler (John Cusack) in 'Say Anything'
Wooing a girl by setting up a boombox outside of her window is a pretty dorky move, but Lloyd Dobler manages to pull it off.

3. McLovin' (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) in 'Superbad'
McLovin' is the best kind of high school nerd: cocky, a la Napoleon Dynamite. His smooth moves land him in bed with the feisty redhead who saunters around school sportin' a mean whale tail.

4. Brad Hamilton (Judge Reinhold) in 'Fast Times at Ridgemont High'
Remember when Brad followed his sis (Jennifer Jason Leigh) to the family planning clinic and gave her a ride home? Awww. Brad's girlfriend was a fool to dump this super nice guy!

5. Ronald Miller (Patrick Dempsey) in 'Can't Buy Me Love'
Hard to believe there was ever a time when Dr. McDreamy had to pay a girl to go out with him, huh?

6. Jim Levenstein (Jason Biggs) in 'American Pie'
Sure, next to Stifler any schmuck looks like a saint. But sweet Jim really does have heart. Foreign hottie Nadia (Shannon Elizabeth) knows that the nerds are where it's at.

7. Preston Myers (Ethan Embry) in 'Can't Hardly Wait'
Awww. Cute little Preston has had a secret crush on the prom queen (Jennifer Love Hewitt) for four years! His plan to finally swoop in is well-timed: she's just been dumped by her jerky jock boyfriend.

8. Randy Meeks (Jamie Kennedy) in 'Scream'
Sidney (Neve Campbell) would have been wise to go out with lovable dork Randy instead of psycho hottie Billy. Looks aren't everything!

9. Cameron James (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) in '10 Things I Hate About You'
Popular blonde Bianca (Larisa Oleynik) could have saved herself a lot of time and heartache if she noticed how cute and sweet nerdy Cameron was before falling for cocky d-bag Joey (Andrew Keegan).

10. The Geek (Anthony Michael Hall) in 'Sixteen Candles'
Yes, he's annoying. And kind of a stalker. But The Geek is a sensitive sweetheart at his core.

They've Got Your Back: The Ultimate Movie Wingmen

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-04-21T17:00:00+00:00

Tongues have been feverishly wagging since the 'Crazy Stupid Love' trailer broke, exposing us all to Ryan Gosling's incredibly ripped abs. As Emma Stone's character points out in the trailer, he looks Photoshopped. After the excitement of seeing Gosling's abs subsides, it becomes apparent that this is a wingman movie, with Gosling taking the dorky dad character played by Steve Carell under his buff, glistening wing.

Doesn't it seem almost counter-intuitive to think that a handsome wingman could help step up a nerdy man's game? After all, wouldn't there be a risk of losing all ladies to the hunk by your side? Particularly in the case of Carell and Gosling in the slated-for-July release 'Crazy, Stupid Love.' Wouldn't any woman who falls into their path be distracted by a) Gosling's perfectly coiffed 'do and rock hard abs and b) wondering what the heck these two are doing hanging out with each other?

Of course, there's a perfectly reasonable back-story that explains how the unlikely duo wound up on the prowl together. Carell's character Cal is heartbroken when his wife (Julianne Moore) wants a divorce, and he meets Gosling's character, Jacob, during a painfully awkward night out at a local bar. (Because really, what hot young bachelor doesn't want a dorky 40-something dad to pick up chicks with?)

Jacob the player doles out some much-needed advice on fashion, flirting and winning over women to nerdy Cal. Meanwhile, Jacob finds himself unexpectedly pining after a nice young lady (played by Emma Stone). Carell's Cal isn't the first movie dork to have a cool guy show him the ropes. The suave movie wingman has certainly become a fixture in movies over the years, as evidenced by the blockbuster 'Hitch,' starring Will Smith and Kevin James as lady whisperer and apprentice, respectively.

With the 'Crazy Stupid Love' trailer out this week, what better time than now to do a rundown of my own personal top five favorite suave, handsome movie wingmen who aim to help out an awkward soul? (No, I didn't forget about 'Hitch.' He's just nowhere near this particular top five list. See paragraph above for further proof that I did not forget about him.)

1. Trent Walker (Vince Vaughn) in 'Swingers.' Everybody's favorite wingman! Really, who wouldn't want Trent by his side while cruising for beautiful babies? (As an aside, does anyone else find the 'babies' lingo in this flick mildly creepy?) Loud, cocky Trent helps sensitive pal Mike (Jon Favreau) realize that he's so money and he doesn't even know it.

2. Randall 'Pink' Floyd (Jason London) in 'Dazed and Confused.' It's nice to know not all seniors are total d--ks out to paddle your ass. Awkward freshman Mitch (Wiley Wiggins) is grateful when cool quarterback Pink takes him under his wing, giving him rides, party invites, advice and more (wink wink).

3. Jack (Mike Vogel) in 'She's Out of My League.' What a random collection of men. Dorky Kirk (Jay Baruchel) hangs out with a sweet, married overweight guy, an obnoxious loudmouth, and an incredibly handsome cool guy named Jack. Jack teaches Kirk about everything from proper man-scaping to how to not be a 'moodle' to winning your hot girlfriend back after making a total idiot of yourself in front of her parents.

4. Robbie Klaven (Andy Samberg) in 'I Love You, Man.' Robbie isn't a traditional wingman, and Peter (Paul Rudd) isn't your typical dork. While Peter has no problem winning over the ladies, he lacks a roster of solid bros. His brother Robbie gives him tips on how to meet dudes and how to have platonic man dates that aren't mistaken for romantic nights out.

5. Jack (Thomas Haden Church) in 'Sideways.' Miles (Paul Giamatti) is kind of a loser. His friend Jack is kind of a jackass, but also kind of a great wingman. He does what Miles is too chicken to do, like initiating contact and arranging dates. Plus, next to Jack's d-baggy behavior, Miles looks pretty darn appealing.

So what wingmen did we miss? Let us know in the comments.

Our Favorite 'Scream' Death Scenes

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-04-14T17:00:00+00:00

So, apparently this 'Scream 4' thing is real and not just a figment of Jay & Silent Bob's collective imagination. The fourth installment in the classic Wes Craven horror franchise hits theaters this week, amid much anticipation.

Neve Campbell is back to reprise her role as Sidney Prescott, the hapless high school student-turned college student-turned self-help author who can't shake psychotic killers wearing creepy Ghostface masks, who are obsessed with killing her. 'Scream' originals David Arquette and Courteney Cox are also back as the dorky Deputy Dewey Riley and the bitchy TV reporter Gale Weathers.

With the core cast members approaching middle age, Craven and writer Kevin Williamson (aka the Teen Whisperer) have thrown in some young'uns, too, so as not to alienate the coveted teen demographic. Emma Roberts ('Nancy Drew'), Hayden Panettiere ('Heroes') and Shenae Grimes ('90210') contribute to bringing the median age of the cast down significantly.

Fans are eagerly awaiting a fresh batch of kill scenes, with good reason. As Charlie (Rory Culkin, 'Signs') and Robbie (Erik Knudsen, 'Saw 2') point out in the 'Scream 4' trailer, in a sequel "every kill has got to be way more extreme." And we've seen some pretty extreme kill scenes in past installments.

Part of what makes the 'Scream' kill scenes so great is their originality and, in many cases, the witty back-and-forth between the victims and their killers. If 'Scream 4' intends to top all other death scenes in the 'Scream' franchise thus far, it certainly has its work cut out for it. With that in mind, here are our top 5 favorite 'Scream' kill scenes to date.

DISCLAIMER #1: If you're squeamish, stop reading now. And for the love of God, do NOT click on the video links.

DISCLAIMER #2: STATEMENT OF THE OBVIOUS: spoiler alert. If you have not seen any/all of the 'Scream' movies and plan to, do not read on.

1. Tatum Riley (Rose McGowan) crushed in the garage door in 'Scream.' Feisty Tatum wasn't going to give up easily. No, sir. She fought back with sassy one-liners right up until the end, when she gets mutilated in the garage door while trying to flee from Ghostface. Can you believe that lame jerk cut her arm? The nerve! Liver alone!

2. Randy Meeks (Jamie Kennedy) yanked into the news van in the middle of broad daylight in 'Scream 2.' Not Randy!!! It's not easy watching the 'Scream' franchise's most lovable character (after Deputy Dewey, of course) unsuspectingly pacing beside the innocuous white news van on a busy street, when you just know the killer is lurking inside. Sure enough, Ghostface snatches Randy into the van and slices him up while a group of morons carrying a boombox saunters by.

3. Cici Cooper (Sarah Michelle Gellar) thrown off the balcony like a rag doll in 'Scream 2.' After watching SMG kick ass for years on 'Buffy,' it feels almost wrong to see her go down so easily as the prissy sorority sister. Sure, it's a horror genre rule that all prissy sorority sisters must die. Since it's SMG, though, it seemed momentarily possible that for once a sister might surprise us by kicking ass. But, alas, Cici proves to be helpless when confronted by Ghostface.

4. Jennifer Jolie (Parker Posey) slashed behind a two-way mirror with Gale and Dewey on the other side in 'Scream 3.' So close, yet so far away. Gale and Dewey could hear her, but couldn't save Jennifer from getting sliced up on the other side of the mirror. When Dewey shoots the last panel down to free her, it's already too late and Jennifer's mutilated body flops through the glass.

5. Maureen Evans (Jada Pinkett Smith) butchered to death in the middle of a crowded movie theater in 'Scream 2.' No, Maureen. That's not your boyfriend sitting beside you wearing the Ghostface mask at the 'Stab' screening. That becomes all too clear when he begins carving her up -- while surrounded by hundreds of people! Nobody even notices poor Maureen until it's too late, when she collapses dramatically in front of the screen.

Honorable mentions: Phil Stevens (Omar Epps) getting stabbed in the ear through a bathroom stall wall in 'Scream 2'; Stu Marker (Matthew Lillard) crushed and electrocuted by a TV Sidney tosses onto his head after biting his wrist and breaking a vase across his head. Take that!

In It for the Money: When Movie Rich Kids Might Lose It All

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-04-07T17:00:00+00:00

It takes a bold man to dare to follow in Dudley Moore's footsteps. And "bold" would certainly describe Russell Brand, among many other things. It's hard to think of anyone better suited than Brand to tackle the iconic role of Arthur Bach, the loud, boorish-yet-affable British hero of the 1981 classic 'Arthur.'

Thirty years later, the movie's timeless theme of love versus money still holds water. The updated 'Arthur' stays remarkably true to the original, with a few key exceptions. For instance, rather than a prickly manservant (played by John Gielgud in the original), Arthur has a sharp-witted nanny played by Helen Mirren this time around. Brand and Mirren are an unlikely comedic duo, but they have such great chemistry it's easy to imagine them teaming up again and again.

And instead of having an uptight Daddy and snobby Grandma to please, modern Arthur has a cold-as-ice mother to contend with. Mommy Dearest fears that Arthur's public shenanigans, like crashing his Batmobile on the streets of Manhattan, make her corporate shareholders nervous. To remedy the situation, she proposes that Arthur marry her promising young employee, Susan (Jennifer Garner).

While the '80s version of Susan was sweet, Jennifer Garner's updated portrayal is sour. She'll stop at nothing to get the Bach name, and she doesn't care that Arthur clearly despises her. Naturally, Arthur falls in love shortly after agreeing to marry Susan. Like the original, the best part of watching this 'Arthur' is seeing him exploit his exorbitant wealth. From his tricked-out penthouse suite -- complete with a magnetic bed and a movie theater playing cartoons on a loop -- the affable hero lives a life we average folks can only dream of.

Of course, the entire movie hinges on the premise that he can lose his fortune at any time if he doesn't go through with the marriage. With that in mind, here's a list of Arthur's most memorable cinematic counterparts who also found themselves at risk of losing a whole lot of money.

1. Arthur Bach (Dudley Moore) in 'Arthur.' Oh, Arthur. Does he really think he could survive without his money? His booze bills alone must be at least the size of an average schmuck's annual salary. As his snarky manservant Hobson points out, shacking up with Liza (with a z!) would undoubtedly save him a ton of cash he'd otherwise be spending on hookers. But still. Could you imagine Arthur schlepping around town on the subway, sans chauffeur? I mean really. Arthur needs to prevent Daddy and Grandma from cutting him off!

2. Monty Capuletti (Rodney Dangerfield) in 'Easy Money.' Rodney is truly the master of playing lovable buffoons. In 'Easy Money,' though, his character must curb his buffoonery or risk losing out on a $10 million inheritance. No more boozin', gamblin' or piggin' out for Monty if he wants to get his hands on the money! Can he do it? Is it physically possible for any character played by Rodney Dangerfield to NOT be a buffoon?

3. Billy Madison (Adam Sandler) in 'Billy Madison.' It was pretty hilarious when Rodney Dangerfield went 'Back to School,' and it's almost as amusing when Billy Madison does it. The stakes are high for Billy, who won't get to run his daddy's company unless he graduates from high school. (You'd think his father would have thrown an MBA stipulation in there, too, but whatevs.) Naturally, Billy gets hot for teacher while back at school.

4. Van Wilder (Ryan Reynolds) in 'National Lampoon's Van Wilder.' Van has the opposite problem Billy Madison has. His rich daddy can't get him to leave school! After seven years at college, daddy cuts Van off, and he's forced to stop drifting and focus on wrapping up his degree. Minus daddy's funds, Van still manages to snag himself a personal assistant, Taj (Kal Penn), whom he pays in advice on how to score chicks. Looks like Van might be able to make it on his own.

5. Joanna Stayton (Goldie Hawn) in 'Overboard.' Super-diva Joanna doesn't technically get cut off, but she does lose access to her megabucks when she loses access to her memory. The spoiled, heartless heiress is forced to live like workin' folks, shacked up with hunky Kurt Russell. Hmm. Well, maybe the simple life isn't so bad.

Rainn Wilson's 'Crimson Bolt' and Other Movie Superhero Wannabes

Annette Bourdeau — 2011-03-31T16:00:00+00:00

"Shut up, crime!"

So says superhero wannabe the Crimson Bolt, played to dorky perfection by Rainn Wilson in this week's release, 'Super.' The Crimson Bolt, the alter ego of average guy Frank, is born when Frank's wife (Liv Tyler) leaves him for a shady drug dealer (Kevin Bacon). Frank wigs out and releases his aggression on unsuspecting bad guys.

Along with his signature catchphrase ("Shut up, crime!"), the Crimson Bolt also doles out sharp one-liners like 'Don't molest kids!', 'Don't steal!', and 'Don't deal drugs!' Clearly, any criminal who falls into the Crimson Bolt's path is in for the tongue-lashing of a lifetime. During his crime-fighting research, Frank crosses paths with Libby, a precocious young woman (Ellen Page) who insists on becoming his costumed sidekick named Boltie. Together, the two crack down on crime. Sort of.

In honor of The Crimson Bolt's cinematic debut, here's a list of my own top five favorite superhero wannabes.

1. Woody Harrelson as Defendor in 'Defendor'
His superhero duds may be crafted out of duct tape, but this avenger makes up for his lack of suaveness with his enthusiasm, integrity and incredible thirst for justice. Bonus points for having a super cool lair and a feisty young sidekick, played by Kat Dennings.

2. Hank Azaria as the Blue Raja in 'Mystery Men'
Not only is he not really a superhero, the Blue Raja isn't even British! And he lives with his mom. He can throw silverware, though, and he does have a lot of forks. And a reasonably cool costume. There's no denying he has a distinctive look that could easily be replicated by adoring fans, should he cultivate any.

3. Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith as Jay and Silent Bob in 'Mallrats,' 'Chasing Amy' and 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back'
We first got a glimpse of the stoner duo's penchant for righting wrongs in 'Mallrats,' when Silent Bob heroically scaled a television dating show's set to play an incriminating video tape exposing the slimy Fashionable Male clerk (Ben Affleck) for being a sleazebag. Jay and Silent Bob serve as inspiration for the Bluntman and Chronic superhero comic books that show up in 'Chasing Amy,' and are featured again in 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back,' when the two heroes head to Hollywood.

4. Aaron Johnson as Dave Lizewski in 'Kick-Ass'
What ordinary kid doesn't daydream about being a superhero? Average teen Dave takes the daydream to the next level, and -- lo and behold -- during his recovery from his first attempt at fighting crime, he actually develops a superhero-like aversion to pain. Wow! Must be fate!

5. Seth Rogen as Britt Reid in 'The Green Hornet'
Britt has access to a lot of money, which is key for any superhero wannabe. His funds enable him to secure all of the superhero necessities, including A) a cunning sidekick (Jay Chou), B) a tricked-out car (the Black Beauty), C) a sexually attractive assistant/researcher (Cameron Diaz) and D) a badass costume.