With the release of "The Last Stand," Arnold Schwarzenegger is officially back in the action movie game. Hear that, Jesse Eisenberg, it's not safe for you to make movies anymore... the jocks are in charge again!
To celebrate this, we've plucked a couple dozen of the ripest, juiciest quotes from over the Austrian Oak's decades-long career that spans the worlds of bodybuilding, entertainment, politics, and being very, very blunt. It's about 599-pages shorter than reading his autobiography, so consider this a beautiful, poetic gift.
"Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million, <a href="http://money.cnn.com/galleries/2007/moneymag/0702/gallery.pop_icons.moneymag/21.html">but I was just as happy when I had $48 million</a>."
"Milk is for babies. When you grow up <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076578/quotes">you have to drink beer</a>."
On environmental villainy
"It is up to us [in government] to say, Here are the laws: You have to inspect the milk so it's clean. You have to inspect the meat. If you screw up with the spinach, we have to take action to make sure people don't get sick. I never think of industry as being villains. I'm not for you getting taxed, if you're an oil company, just to punish you. But we [the government] have to guide you and say, <a href="http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/2007/04/02/8403410/index.htm">This is the new direction we are going to go</a>."
On his carbon footprint
"I have a private plane. But I fly <a href="http://sfist.com/2012/10/01/arnold_schwarzenegger_talks_total_r.php">commercial when I go to environmental conferences</a>."
"I have a love interest in every one of my films -- <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/23244-i-have-a-love-interest-in-every-one-of-my?auto_login_attempted=true">a gun</a>."
On his Governor's salary
"I didn’t take a penny of my salary during my terms. After all, <a href="http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/film/4591266/Arnie-Ill-be-back-as-Conan-The-Barbarian.html">it was petty cash compared to what you make in the movies</a>."
On power… and possibly Hitler?
"I was always dreaming about very powerful people, dictators and things like that. I was just always impressed by people who could be remembered for hundreds of years, or even, like Jesus, be<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076578/quotes"> for thousands of years remembered</a>."
"The best activities for your health <a href="http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=107139661&page=1">are pumping and humping</a>."
"I am like, uh, getting the feeling of coming in a gym, I'm getting the feeling of coming at home, I'm getting the feeling of coming backstage when I pump up, when I pose in front of 5,000 people, I get the same feeling, so I am coming day and night. I mean, it's terrific. Right? So you know,<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076578/quotes"> I am in heaven</a>."
"I just use my muscles as a conversation piece, <a href="http://www.unstoppablestrength.com/top-10-arnold-schwarzenegger-quotes/">like someone walking a cheetah down 42nd Street</a>."
"As long as I live, I will never forget that day 21 years ago when I raised my hand and took the oath of citizenship. Do you know how proud I was? I was so proud that I walked around with an <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2004/08/31/politics/campaign/01TEXT-ARNOLD.html?pagewanted=all">American flag around my shoulders all day long</a>."
On being a Republican
"Listening to Nixon speak sounded more like a breath of fresh air. I said to my friend, 'What party is he?' My friend said, 'He's a Republican.' I said, 'Then I am a Republican!' And I've been a Republican ever since! And trust me, in my wife's family, <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2004/08/31/politics/campaign/01TEXT-ARNOLD.html?pagewanted=all">that's no small achievement</a>!"
"I came home and one of my kids started crying and saying 'Daddy you didn't come to my recital.' And then all of the sudden the other said 'Dad you didn't come to my football game,' and then my daughter was saying 'You didn't come to my dance and you're never around' and all the sudden all of the kids were crying. And Maria was saying '<a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505263_162-57523328/schwarzenegger-talks-divorce-strains-of-office/">Go ahead just express yourself kids, I think Daddy needs to hear it</a>.'"
On 'Batman & Robin'
"I don't regret it at all. I felt that the character was interesting and two movies before that one Joel Schumacher was at his height. So the decision-making process was not off. At the same time I was doing 'Eraser' over there and Warner Bros. <a href="http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/JoshWildingNewsAndReviews/news/?a=71908#DWXkWq8rl9AcK0lb.99">begged me to do the movie</a>."
"One of my movies was called 'True Lies.' It's what the Democrats <a href="http://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/convention2004/arnoldschwarzenegger2004rnc.htm">should have called their convention</a>."
On Ariana Huffington's loophole
"You personally... your personal income tax has the biggest loophole. I can drive my hummer through it. <a href="http://www.pbs.org/newshour/bb/politics/july-dec03/recall_9-25.html">That's how big your loophole is</a>."
On James Cameron
"My friend James Cameron and I made three films together – 'True Lies,' 'The Terminator' and 'Terminator 2.' Of course, <a href="http://thinkexist.com/quotation/my-friend-james-cameron-and-i-made-three-films/349621.html">that was during his early, low-budget, art-house period</a>."
On 'Total Recall'
"Ha ha ha… I just continuously used him as a human shield, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncR2_pnzngM&feature=player_embedded">and then threw him down the escalator</a>."
On totally recalling stuff
"If it's hard to remember,<a href="http://www.searchquotes.com/quotation/If_it's_hard_to_remember,_it'll_be_difficult_to_forget./188093/"> it'll be difficult to forget</a>."
On gay marriage
"I think that gay marriage is something that should be <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2003/ALLPOLITICS/08/27/schwarzenegger.views/index.html">between a man and a woman</a>."
On work ethic
"You can scream at me, call me for a shoot at midnight, keep me waiting for hours - <a href="http://www.idlehearts.com/quotes/you-can-scream-at-me-call-me-for-a-shoot-at-midnight/">as long as what ends up on the screen is perfect</a>."
On a 'Twins' sequel
"I would love to do another 'Twins'… As a matter of fact, we’ve been talking about doing one and it’s called 'Triplets.' I’d find somebody like Eddie Murphy or someone that people would say, 'How does that happen, medically speaking?' and, 'Physically, there’s no way!' Then, somehow, we would explain it. That would be hilarious with <a href="http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=88837">what we know about someone like him</a>."
On Danny DeVito
"He was always insisting on smoking bigger cigars than I did! <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xE7DqY5rc50">Because he was short!</a>"
On body typing
"It's simple, if it jiggles, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Its-Simple-Jiggles-Pumping-Iron/dp/B002M8EIMY">it's fat</a>."
"I have inhaled, <a href="http://todaythoughts.com/i-have-inhaled-exhaled-everything">exhaled everything</a>."
"The politicians make a mistake; they keep spending and spending and spending, and then when they realize they made a mistake and spent money they don't even have, then they go out, they go tax, tax, tax. You guys have an addiction problem. You should go to an addiction place, <a href="http://www.pbs.org/newshour/bb/politics/july-dec03/recall_9-25.html">because you cannot stop spending</a>."
“What is the point of being on this Earth if you are <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/19112177">going to be like everyone else</a>?”
On whether he'll be back or not
"I'll be back."