If you've been living under a rock recently, we have some bad news: The jig is up. The game is over. We're finished. The apocalypse is upon us.
Yes, the day you've been waiting for is almost here. This Saturday, May 21, 2011, Jesus Christ will return to earth to kick things into high gear, according to a movement of loosely affiliated Christian groups, websites and radio stations that have mounted an elaborate campaign, including billboards, bus stop bench ads and a traveling caravan, all to spread the word. If you live in a major northeastern city, someone is probably standing on your street corner with a "Save the Date" sign right this very second.
In celebration of the End of Days, we've compiled the five best apocalyptic scenarios we could think of
Watch the world get destroyed again and again after the jump. And even though this should be self-explanatory, be warned, some violent and disturbing content follows.
Bombs go off in movies all the time, but a fictional nuclear tragedy has never felt more real than it did in James Cameron's 1991 smash 'Terminator 2: Judgment Day.' Rather than focus on the demolition of buildings, Cameron opted to show the explosion from Sarah Conner's (Linda Hamilton) point of view. And what she watching when the bomb went off? A playground full of children, of course.
Attack by Aliens:
Steven Spielberg has a complex relationship with aliens. Sometimes they are lovable and nice and remind everyone what it means to be a family ('E.T.'), and sometimes they are pretty awful. The aliens in the 2005 remake of 'War of the Worlds' fall squarely in the latter category. They're here to take over, and they brought massive tripods equipped with lasers that reduce us mortals to dust. Watch your back!
The Weather Turns On Us
Remember when 'The Day After Tomorrow' came out and there were all those TV specials asking how realistic the story was? Do you remember the answer? It was "Well, it probably wouldn't be that fast, but yeah, it could kinda happen." Climate change has made the possibility of mega-storms a scary-real prospect, and director Roland Emmerich, no stranger to world destruction after 'Independence Day,' gave us a peek at what it could look like with 'Tomorrow.' As usual in films like this, things do not turn out well for New York City.
Though our friends who are predicting this weekend's apocalypse might try and tell you that Satan created fossils to fool you, most scientists agree that a major impact by an asteroid killed the dinosaurs. A big one smashed into Earth (some say in the Gulf of Mexico near the Yucatan Peninsula), sent a bunch of debris into the atmosphere, blocking out the sun and killing most of the plant life that sustained the food chain. Dino and his friends were kaput. So, it's only natural that the asteroid-meets-Earth scenario is a favorite way to scare audiences. In 30 short seconds, Paris bid adieu to the face of the planet when a big guy slammed into the city's center in 1998's 'Armageddon.' We're not sure what Jesus has planned for Saturday, but consider our telescopes pointed skyward.
Zombies (Of Course)
It seems pretty impossible to talk about the apocalypse without addressing how it's really going to go down: a zombie plague. That's what we're all waiting for, right? The zombie apocalypse. Having taken numerous Facebook quizzes on the topic, we feel informed enough on the topic to recommend that you build a massive moat around your house and wait it out. (They'll run out of brains eventually.) If the virus is airborne, well, we're all screwed.
Happy Doomsday, everyone!