If you've annoyed the pants off everyone around you by pretending that you're She-Ra and exclaiming, "Sword to shield!" every time you open your umbrella (or was that just me?), this gunbrella, à la the Joker, might save you. It won't make the Penguin jealous, because his gunbrella can actually kill people, but that's OK -- he's just a bird.
It's all fun until someone loses an eye, but this solid wood handle, auto-open trigger, 40" diameter canopy umbrella, with a pop-gun style "BANG" plastered across it will help you win friends, influence people, and piss off Batmen everywhere. Also, it beats the hell out of your neighbor's 'Starry Night' umbrella -- that guy lost an ear, anyway -- and it's classier than the double beer helmet.
Pick up one of these bad boys over here. It'll be shipped from the UK and run you under 20 bucks -- a small price to pay for popularity.