We're live-blogging the 2011 Golden Globe Awards with Cinematical's William Goss, Eric D. Snider and Scott Weinberg. Keep refreshing this page for the latest piece of snark-filled wisdom from our team of professional awards show live-bloggers, and check out the links below for a list of nominees, as well as winners and red carpet photos updated in real time. Enjoy the show!

2011 Golden Globe Winners (updated in real time)
Check out your favorite stars on the red carpet
All 2011 Golden Globes Coverage

10:58PM: So that's that on a slightly amusing awards show. Imagine how much cooler those awards would be if they were based on honest opinions of merit and not marketing budgets and free flights to Vegas. Thanks for reading!

10:56PM: Mr. Douglas is here to give out the last award: Best Picture (drama sub-heading) is 'The Social Network.' Take that, MySpace!

10:54PM: The ass-kickin' Michael Douglas is in the house. Very nice.

10:52PM: I really hope the surprise guest is Paul Lynde. Now that would be a surprise.

10:50PM: Another commercial break means another movie commercial. (That's me doing the silver lining thing.) (Hey, what a weird little David Paymer cameo in that phone commercial.)

10:47PM: There are sound problems at the stadium as Sandra Bullock saunters out looking a little creepy. She hands Best Actor (Draaaamaaa!) to Colin Firth for 'The King's Speech.' (Because the voters are all foreigners!!!!!)

10:44PM: Seriously, though: congratulations to 'The Kids Are All Right' for being named superior to 'Burlesque,' 'Red,' 'The Tourist,' and 'Alice in Wonderland.'

10:39PM: The charming Tom Hanks arrives with the Tim Allen anchor around his neck. They're here to hand out the award for Best Comedy Picture: 'The Kids Are All Right.' Shocker there.

10:38PM: Hey, what's Ricky Gervais doing here?

10:37PM: Ms. Portman calls Mila Kunis "sweet lips." I think I need a moment.

10:34: The award is Best Actress, drama division. Jeff Bridges hands it to ...... Natalie Portman. (Nicole Kidman was robbed.) (Like I care.)

10:32PM: The too-cool-for-Globes Joseph Gordon Levitt stops by to introduce the dazzlingly exposition-laden 'Inception.'

10:30PM: Nah it's not offensive that it's the FEMALE engineer who devises a "wipeable keyboard!!" Dear lord I hate commercials.

10:28PM: Tim Allen looks like a guy I'd be hesitant to buy a used car from. Not sure why.

10:26PM: The ridiculously hot Halle Berry to deliver 'Best Actor: Comedy / Musical." The winner is Paul Giamatti for 'Barney's Version.' Stunned the HFPA even saw this movie. (They didn't.)

10:24PM: The classy Alicia Keyes introduces the kick-ass 'Black Swan.' That's all I got.

10:23PM: If boobs didn't exist, how would advertisers sell stuff?

10:19PM: Hats off to one of the hippie 'Glee' writers who grabs the microphone to pay some respect to America's teachers. A nice dose of sincerity in a sea of platitudes.

10:18PM: Jimmy Fallon and January Boobs are on hand to give out an award for Best Comedy TV Series. We don't care about this stuff. We're a movie site. (Fine, 'Glee' won. Also, 'Glee' is fast becoming Skynet.)

10:17PM: There we go: it's not an acceptance speech until they cut away to Angelina Jolie applying some lip gloss.

10:16PM: Annette Bening is on hand to hand out Best Director: The winner is David Fincher for 'The Social Network.'

10:13PM: Megan Fox, looking like a sexy slice of wedding cake, introduces 'The Tourist.'

10:10PM: Weinberg in the house! (I've been ranting on twitter until now.) I sincerely loved that speech De Niro gave. Now I'm watching an ad for Abilififly.


10:05PM: Oh, and then De Niro makes a joke about most of the waiters having been deported. Not sure how we feel about that. But then this: "These movies are like my children, except my children are more expensive and you can't remake them in 3D to push up the grosses." All is forgiven, Bobby D. All will always be forgiven.

10:04PM: De Niro says he's glad the HFPA chose him for this award before they had a chance to review 'Little Fockers.' See, it's a funny joke because the members of the HFPA don't write reviews.

10:04PM: Eh, you know, it doesn't even matter. De Niro could make a hundred bad movies -- I'm sorry, a hundred more bad movies -- and there would still be a couple dozen great ones on the shelf.

10:00PM: The never-not-charming Matt Damon introduces De Niro by misremembering the roles he played. "'Taxi Driver' -- utterly unrecognizable as a blond 13-year-old hooker." Good stuff, Matty!

9:58PM: Haha, when I made the joke earlier about Robert De Niro's career being dead, I forgot that he was getting the Cecil B. DeMille lifetime achievement award. Named for a filmmaker who is also not making good films anymore either, I might point out.

9:51PM: The Best Supporting Actress category is always crammed with great choices. I could vote for any of these. Jeremy Irons chooses Melissa Leo for 'The Fighter.' (I assume whoever is presenting gets to decide the winner, right?) She says she was too young to play Wahlberg and Bale's mother, and she ain't kidding. She's 11 years older than Wahlberg, 14 years older than Bale. Stay tuned for more birthday trivia!

9:49PM: More TV stuff?? Don't they know this is a movie blog? Anyway, the guy from 'Big Bang Theory' who looks like Anne Hathaway wins for Best Actor TV Comedy.

9:46PM: "Hey, Jane Fonda! You've won two Oscars, six Golden Globes, and haven't been on the show in a quarter-century. Please come introduce one of the Best Picture nominees!" "Sure, I'd be honored! Which one? 'The King's Speech'? 'The Social Network'?" "Well, no..."

9:41PM: Vanessa Williams and Blair Underwood hand out the award for Best Actress TV Comedy or Musical; the winner is Laura Linney for 'The Big C'; she isn't there; let us never speak of this again.

9:40PM: Sexy elderly person Helen Mirren presents clips from Best Drama nominee 'The King's Speech,' on account of she and the movie are both British. The announcer mentions that she's in 'RED,' which is nominated tonight, but that can't be right, can it? 'RED' didn't get nominated for anything. Come on, you guys.

9:37PM: Denmark represent! 'In a Better World' wins for Best Foreign Language Film! It is presented by Robert Pattinson and one of the current Olivias.

9:31PM: Speaking of Golden Globes, how about that Sofia Vergara?

9:30PM: A couple guys named Chris who play superheroes in movies that haven't come out yet present the Best Supporting Actress TV prize to the very tall and funny Jane Lynch. She's on that 'Glee' televisual program.

9:27PM: And the award for Screenplay from the Film Whose Publicist Sent the Nicest Gift Basket to the HFPA goes to... 'The Social Network'! Aaron Sorkin accepts the award, talks for a minute; will give his real speech while walking through the hallways backstage.

9:25PM: Seeing Tina Fey and Steve Carell present the Best Screenplay award reminds me that 'Date Night' should have been about 1,000 times funnier than it was.

9:20PM: One year from now, this commercial for the Adam Sandler movie where Jennifer Aniston has to pretend to be married to him will re-air in conjunction with its Golden Globe nomination.

9:17PM: Hey! This 'Temple Grandin' thing won at the Emmys, too! No fair double-dipping. Claire Danes picks up the trophy for Best Actress in a TV Movie or Miniseries. The real Temple Grandin is there, pleased as punch. Are we allowed to make jokes about Temple Grandin? No? Not even the shirt? OK. That's cool.

9:13PM: Naturally, Tilda Swinton calls a TV movie a "televisual movie." Why wouldn't she? She and Geoffrey Rush present the Best Actor in a Televisual Movie award to Al Pacino. He played Jack Kevorkian, whose next patient is Robert De Niro's career.

9:10PM: Sylvester Stallone introduces Best Drama Nominee 'The Fighter,' because he played a boxer in a movie, or something.

9:04PM: Now, time for Snider to run with it!

8:59PM: Gervais introduces Robert Downey, Jr. by his rehab facilities. RDJ: "I don't know if an actress can do her best work until she's slept with me..." And the winner for Best Actress in a Comedy/Musical is: Annette Bening for 'The Kids Are All Right.'

WHAT DID JUSTIN BIEBER DO TO HIS HAIR?????!!!!!! He and Hailee Steinfeld are presenting Best Animated Feature, which goes to... 'Toy Story 3.' Director Lee Unkrich: "Were you two even born when the first one came out?"

8:49PM: And Best Original Score goes to Trent Reznor and Atticus Finch for 'The Social Network.' Eff yeah.

8:45PM: Alec Baldwin and Jennifer Lopez are presenting Best Original Song. Lopez looks like she ran into a pile of Charmin and glitter. And the winner is... "You Haven't Seen the Last of Me" from 'Burlesque.' Say, didn't the HFPA get flown out to Vegas to see Cher perform said tune...?

8:44PM: Andrew Garfield presents 'The Social Network' as Best Drama Nominee, trips over the word "inspiringly." Ricky Gervais calls that his favorite film of the year, with no snarky punchline. (Amen.)

8:42PM: My prediction: Johnny Depp sweeps the rest of the night's awards -- even the ones he's not nominated for.

8:37PM: Steve Buscemi must've been the basis for Rango.

8:34PM: I'd like to take this opportunity to thank my friend Adam for lending me his laptop while mine's in the shop. It's really been such an hon-- (music swells)

8:30PM: Michelle Pfeiffer presents 'Alice in Wonderland' as Best Comedy Nominee. There's two things I'd forgotten entirely about.

8:26PM: Spotted Annette Bening in the background. Her hair was apparently done by the Penny-in-a-Light-Socket Salon.

8:22PM: Gervais introduces Bruce Willis as "Ashton Kutcher's dad!" Willis presents 'Red' as Best Comedy Nominee. Can't imagine why.

8:17PM: Julianne Moore and Kevin Spacey are presenting best miniseries/TV movie. Since 'Carlos' is nominated, we might as well stay seated... The winner is... 'Carlos,' which I believe will be shown in full this Friday night on the Sundance Channel.

8:10PM: TV awards. Yeah, TV...

8:07PM: Scarlett Johansson is presenting Best Supporting Actor, and the winner is... Christian Bale for 'The Fighter.' Not the biggest surprise, but well-deserved. Jokingly acknowledges that he only recognized the HFPA once they recognized him.

8:03PM: Host Ricky Gervais is rightfully ragging on 'The Tourist' and HFPA bribes in general. Way to kick things off, RG!

8:00PM: And we're live! Tonight's blog is (unofficially) brought to you by Woodpecker Hard Cider, because if the stars aren't going through this thing sober, why should we?