We recently heard the news that 'Paranormal Activity 3' has claimed itself a release date for October 21st, 2011, and that's not a huge surprise, especially with the 'Saw' series taking a hiatus for a while. But on behalf of all the old-school horror freaks, we're here to offer a few reminders of the problems that can often afflict a Horror Flick Part 3.

'Friday the 13th Part 3' (1983) -- Not that the first two were any sort of Hitchcockian masterpieces ... although they do look like it in relation to this outlandishly tacky, cheap-looking sequel that upped the body count but lowered the creepiness factor tenfold. Plus, yes, this was one of the myriad horror sequels that took to the early-'80s 3-D resurgence and suffered mightily for it. Try not to chuckle out loud when this flick tries to toss an eyeball, an arrow, or a joint directly into your face. (Lesson learned: don't shoot horror like it's porn, and stay away from 3-D.)

'Hellraiser 3: Hell on Earth' (1992) -- This one's actually not bad; we're using it as a warning, though: go any further with the 'Hellraiser' franchise then the first three films and you're simply wasting life hours. Yes, Doug Bradley is always cool as Pinhead, but from Part 4 onward, his presence is fairly pointless. (Ha, get it?) And there are about 45 of these lame sequels, so be careful. (Lesson learned: quit while you're ahead.)



'Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3' (1990) -- If you're looking for pure, unbridled gore explosions, here they are. (Well, what the MPAA left, anyway.) Oh, also Viggo Mortensen as a raving lunatic. (Lesson learned: the MPAA are a squeamish lot.)

'Child's Play 3' (1991) -- The little kid with the homicidal dolly ... goes to military school. Insert obvious revenge killings and such. Dull. (Lesson learned: try something new ... which they did with Chucky on Parts 4 and 5!)

'Jaws 3' (1983) -- It'd be amazingly laughable even without the chintzy 3-D, but that just makes it stupider. The true awfulness of 'Jaws 3' is magnified by the inarguable awesomeness of Part 1 and the matinee-style fun of Part 2. (Lesson learned: try harder.)



'Leprechaun 3' (1995) -- The angry little jerk hadn't even made it into space yet! (Part 4) Or "tha hood"! That happened in parts 5 and 6, if you can believe it. (Lesson learned: don't be redundant, stupid, and unscary. Horror fans don't like that.)

'Final Destination 3' (2006) -- The first flick had a plane crash and the sequel had a horrific highway collision ... so logically Part 3 has to open with a sequence involving a tragically faulty roller coaster. (Lesson learned: up the ante!)

'Amityville 3' (1983) -- So what we're saying here is this: stay away from 3-D! (Lesson learned: NO MORE 3-D!)

'Halloween 3: Season of the Witch' (1982) -- Another Part 3 that's actually pretty good, but it's sort of an infamous film because it's a 'Halloween' sequel that has nothing to do with Michael Myers. Apparently Carpenter's plan was to turn the franchise into a different scary story each time out; that plan didn't work out too well, and Mikey was back (for better or for worse) for Part 4. (Lesson learned: fans are troublemakers.)



CATEGORIES Horror, Cinematical