In fact, the former cohost of the radio and TV program 'Loveline' has quite a few pet peeves about taking in films at the theater and in a recent interview with Moviefone to promote his rant-filled new book, 'In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks,' he offered them up to us without hesitation.
1. Don't Grab My Seat
Carolla: "I don't like it when the person in back of you has to go to the bathroom and they treat the back of your seat like a chin-up bar. Like, they literally grab onto it and help themselves up with it like they're in some sort of physical rehab or your chair's a towel bar. It's like, 'Hey, dude, you don't think I can feel you trying to pull my seat off?'"
2. Quit Showing Ads
Carolla: "I don't like commercials being played in a place where there shouldn't be commercials. You've already paid for the product -- why are we seeing commercials? At least have the little animated hot dog guy being chased by the popcorn box."
3. Buy More Goobers
Carolla: "I don't like the idea that Raisinets outsells Goobers, like, ten to one. That's just a f***ing horrible sign. Goobers are much better than Raisinettes."
4. Clean My Kids' 3-D Lenses
Carolla: "I don't like 3-D, but I'm guessing our dads didn't like not smoking on airplanes or having to wear seatbelts. It's just become a part of our culture and you're going to have to live with it.
"But the real problem with 3-D is when you go see this Pixar sh*t in 3-D. They give out the glasses, the kids eat the popcorn and immediately they get the butter flavoring smeared all over the lenses. The next thing you know, we're filming a Liz Taylor perfume ad from the '80s because you can barely f***ing see out of the things."
5. Cool It with the 5-5-5 Numbers
Carolla: "My biggest beef is the 5-5-5 phone numbers. It drives me insane when they do the 'Here, you can call me at 5-5-5 ...' That's like yelling, 'In a movie, in a movie, in a movie.' I'd rather they just hit the f***ing guy in the head with a boom mike. It would be less distracting. Nothing takes me out of a movie more.
"And the thing that's pathetic about it is they don't actually need to do it; they could get around it. It's like, 'What? You guys aren't creative enough to work around that super-distracting thing that everyone knows is a movie number? How f***ing bad is that?'
"In that recent movie 'You Again,' Betty White is, like, on the street and a hunky guy comes by. And she's like, 'Oh, you can have my phone number: 5-5-5 ... ' It was in the commercial! What's wrong with everyone!? It's been going on long enough for everyone to know that 5-5-5 means you're in a movie, and the whole idea [about seeing movies is supposed to be] suspension of disbelief. So why are you pulling me out of the moment?"