Warner Bros. announced two days ago that its 'Superman' reboot would be directed by Zack Snyder, whose owl cartoon is currently freaking out young audiences in theaters nationwide. But no sooner had the e-ink dried on the Interblogs than another interesting fact emerged: WB originally wanted Darren Aronofsky to handle the reboot, but went to Snyder because they knew he could get it done a lot faster than the meticulous Aronofsky.
This presents us with a fascinating philosophical quandary. Would 'Superman: Man of Steel' be better as directed by Aronofsky or by Snyder? Like most fascinating philosophical quandaries, this one is pointless. The gig is Snyder's, period, and he hasn't made the movie yet, and Aronofsky will never make it at all, so we can't compare them. But pointlessness has never been an obstacle before, so let us proceed with the arguments!
- The possibility that he'd cast Mickey Rourke as Daily Planet editor Perry White.
- The hyper-stylized sequence where Superman injects liquid Kryptonite into his arm, his pupils dilate, and he destroys Metropolis before passing out in an alley.
- His upcoming 'Black Swan' is about dual identities and good vs. evil, and the main character is in tights most of the time.
- The possibility that he'd cast Mickey Rourke as Superman.
- Superman, Clark Kent, and Kal-El exist in three different time periods; nobody understands what's going on; somehow Rachel Weisz is involved.
- Remember what happens to Jennifer Connelly at the end of 'Requiem for a Dream'? Now picture it with Lois Lane.
- 'The Owls of Ga'Hoole' shows his facility with heroic flying creatures who do battle against evil. (Little-known fact: Like an owl, Superman also regurgitates the fur and bones of his victims in pellet form.)
- After '300,' a movie about a muscular, flamboyantly dressed bachelor isn't much of a stretch.
- Everyone gets one mediocre superhero movie, and Snyder already made his.
- Might be tempted to give Superman CGI abs.
- Running time: 120 minutes. Running time if all the slow-motion scenes are played at regular speed: 75 minutes.
- Would upset purists with his insistence on using fast Lex Luthor instead of traditional slow Lex Luthor.
What do YOU (the person reading this) think? Who would be a better director for 'Superman: Man of Steel'?
|Zack Snyder||284 (57.1%)|
|Darren Aronofsky||213 (42.9%)|