Have you ever wanted to go to Burning Man, but can't stomach all the damned hippies? Then I have the party for you. For years, Burning Man has raged on in the desert, establishing a pustulant bulwark of erratic behavior and poor hygiene. I love parties, don't get me wrong, but I'd rather not be asphyxiated by someone else's body odor or worry about getting rundown by a motorized couch. Wasteland Weekend looks to rectify that. It's a post-apocalyptic hootenanny in Southern California that takes its inspiration from the grandaddy of nihilist cinema, Mad Max. For 3 days, savages clad in leather and armor will drunkenly frolic around the desert, howling at the moon and riding around on custom bikes and even the legendary V8 Interceptor. It sounds deliciously atavistic and a recipe for something genuinely horrible to happen.

This adults-only event has scheduled various bits of entertainment, like staged fights, a 'Bartertown' market, fire demonstrations, DJ's, and all sorts of other things that sane people will sneer at. I'm hoping humanity will break down and the participants will split into factions. They'll starting pillaging and butchering each other for water. All of this rages until the National Guard rolls in and exterminates the freaks. But then? The lone survivor uploads it all to YouTube. If I can't get Fury Road, that's the movie I want to see.

It takes place on October 22nd through October 24th. You can get more information, including tickets, at the official site. If any of you attend, please don't forget to chain an androgynous blonde guy to your belt. Lord Humongous decrees it!