That sound you hear is Dylan Baker downing a bottle of Maker's Mark and drunk dialing his agent to contemplate exactly where things went wrong.
According to The Playlist, Sony wants Inglourious Basterds villain and Oscar winner Christoph Waltz to play the villain in Marc Webb's upcoming Spider-Man reboot. And that villain would be Dr. Curt Conners (aka the Lizard), a reptilian humanoid monster that showcases, like most Spider-Man villains, exactly what happens when you step beyond the boundaries of safe science.
Let's say there's some truth to this (and you should be taking all of this with several grains of salt). What does it mean? Well, for one thing, it means Dylan Baker's hopes and dreams of personally fighting Spidey while on the sets of Spider-Man 2 and Spider-Man 3 were all for naught. It will also be Waltz's third villainous role in a mainstream blockbuster since his appearance as Hans Landa in Tarantino's instant classic.
At the very least, Webb and Sony are apparently looking to class this movie up. First they got indie favorite Andrew Garfield to don the red and blue tights and now they're pursuing an Oscar winner to play the mutant lizard-man with a penchant for destruction. Heck, the same role was offered to Michael Fassbender, also of Inglourious Basterds fame, as well as the tragically underseen Hunger. What's next? Isabella Rossellini as Aunt May?
With shooting set to begin in December, we should be hearing more casting news soon. Hopefully, every name will be as interesting as Garfield and Waltz.
Oh, and one more thing...
Sony, bring back J.K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson. Screw continuity. That's how you get people on the side of this reboot thing.