First of all: no, there are no official plans to remake The Godfather.

But at the rate that our film industry is devouring its own tail, let's go ahead and treat it like a foregone conclusion anyway. That's the idea behind The Remake Game, in which we try to strike the first blow on who we think Hollywood would cast in the most obvious rehash of a timeless classic, as well as who we think should be cast on this theoretical project. Come on, you dream-cast with your friends already; we're just making a thing out of it.

For example, in the Hollywood version directed by... I don't know, Brett Ratner:

  • Shia LaBeouf would be your inevitable Michael Corleone
  • Mark Strong could feasibly play mob boss Don Vito
  • Sam Rockwell would easily end up as hot-headed Sonny
  • Timothy Olyphant wouldn't be a bad Tom Hagen, actually
  • someone like Justin Long or Jay Baruchel for Fredo
  • and Amanda Seyfried as Michael's eventual wife, Kay.

See? There's some decent talent in there, but try telling me that Shia wouldn't be on any short-list to replace a young Al Pacino. (After all, it's the next logical step after playing the new young Charlie Sheen.)

However, in my ideal version:

  • Joseph Gordon-Levitt would end up as Michael Corleone
  • Gary Oldman would make a decent Don Vito
  • Ben Foster could be Sonny (he's got the temper down)
  • Shea Whigham would try Tom Hagen on for size
  • a clean-shaven, straight-faced Danny McBride as Fredo
  • and the doe-eyed wonder that is Carey Mulligan for Kay.
Eh? Tell me that's not a cast with more considerable chops than the one above it.

Now it's your turn. Tell us who you'd rather cast as:

  • Michael Corleone (Al Pacino's role),
  • Don Vito (Marlon Brando),
  • Sonny (James Caan),
  • Tom Hagen (Robert Duvall),
  • Fredo (John Cazale),
  • and Kay (Diane Keaton).
Or have you come up with any more glaring candidates to recommend for the studio version? Do share! That's the fun of it... at least, until we get a teaser trailer in 2013.