CATEGORIES Features, Oscars, Awards
Christoph Waltz in Inglourious BasterdsIt's not a stretch that ReelzChannel made Oscar night "Bingo" cards commemorating nominee Christoph Waltz's most memorable line in 'Inglourious Basterds': "That's a Bingo!"

The catch phrase caught on probably because it was delivered so preciously we almost forgot Waltz's character was a ruthless Nazi. Almost.

However, the cards as they stand, with Waltz's face used as markers, make the awards show guessing game a bit too easy. Might we suggest some far more difficult Academy Awards prediction cards? Christoph Waltz in Inglourious BasterdsIt's not a stretch that ReelzChannel made Oscar night "Bingo" cards commemorating nominee Christoph Waltz's most memorable line in 'Inglourious Basterds': "That's a Bingo!"

The catch phrase caught on probably because it was delivered so preciously we almost forgot Waltz's character was a ruthless Nazi. Almost.

However, the cards as they stand, with Waltz's face used as markers, make the awards show guessing game a bit too easy. Might we suggest some far more difficult Academy Awards prediction cards?

For instance, gaining a marker on the real cards every time someone who died this year -- Farrah Fawcett, Bea Arthur, Brittany Murphy, etc. -- is remembered is child's play. Why not win a chip if someone living is remembered, accidentally? Oops.

Example:
"Did they just do a tribute to Abe Vigoda? Pretty sure that dude's still alive."

ReelzChannel's game also gives out a marker every time a red carpet correspondent asks, "Who are you wearing?" We think players should only get a chip if the attendee answers, "Your mother" in a thick, Boston accent.

On the topic of awkward interactions, players of the real game can also mark a space if someone who loses an award looks disappointed on camera. We say mark a space if after someone loses, Kanye West gets up on stage to defend them.

Example:
"Yo, Avatar, I'm gonna let you finish but Pocahontas had one of the best noble savage metaphors of all time ... of all time!"

We say also mark one if upon losing for best supporting actress, one of the nominees climbs the background scaffolding on set like that guy from Rage Against the Machine did at the 2000 MTV Music Awards.

Example: "I did not know Vera Farmiga could even do that!"

The ReelzChannel cards say to gain a chip if predictably loony Woody Harrelson does something unpredictable. Again, too easy. But if Stanley Tucci starts hanging out with a shirtless Lance Armstrong on a beach, mark a space.

On that same note, mark a space if Matt Damon does his entire acceptance speech for best supporting actor as Matthew McConaughey. Actually, just fill up your whole card if Damon even wins his category.

If "God" is mentioned in any acceptance speech, players of the real game get to mark a space. How about if someone, for once, thanks "[their] dark lord and savior Satan?" Most likely to do so? Best supporting actress nominee Anna Kendrick (What? Girl was frightening in 'Camp!')

Example: "I knew 'Twilight' was the work of the devil!"

ReelzChannel has players win a chip if Oscar co-hosts Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin are introduced as "Jack Donaghy" and "the jerk" after the roles they're currently most known for. We'll allow that one, but players should get to mark three spaces in a row if Baldwin then calls Martin the "rude thoughtless little pig."

Okay, so it's unlikely the Awards will get as out of control as our Bingo cards would predict. If you're looking to play the prediction game and have an actual chance at winning, maybe stick with the real thing. Besides, it'll be more fun if someone at your Oscar party actually gets to yell, "That's a Bingo!"