Weekend at Bernies
–verb (used with object), -mat⋅ed, -mat⋅ing.
1. to feign the appearances of life.
2. to give artificial vigor, spirit, or courage to.
3. to pretend something that is dead is not dead even though everyone else should be able to tell it is dead.
4. to do something silly that benefits no one but yourself.

Nearly three years ago, Erik Davis was relaying a story from Moviehole that a pair of producers were gearing up to remake Weekend at Bernies, the classic Aristotelian tragedy about two corporate stooges who pretend their dead boss isn't dead in order to throw parties, meet beach chicks, and save their own skin from the hitmen who accidentally killed their boss in the first place. Obviously, nothing ever came of that.

Fast forward another three years. Moviehole is, once again, on the case of the phantom Weekend at Bernies remake and are now reporting that the original film's producers, Gladdin Entertainment, are once again trying to summon Bernie's comedy gold from beyond the pale. There are no apparent writers or directors attached to the project yet, nor any hints of returning players, but the report is that Gladdin plans to re-animate the flick just as soon as they finish their equally unnecessary and unwanted remake of Mannequin (a remake whose existence our own John Gholson wisely sighted as a sign of the End of Days).

Maybe I'm just too cynical. Maybe Weekend at Bernies II, as evidenced below, burned me more than I'm willing to admit. Whatever the case, whoever the cast, I just can't imagine getting interested in this. But, hey, maybe I'm in the minority on that?