Inhibitions: gone. Savings account: gone. Pants: gone.
Without men trying to one-up each other on Vegas stories, the lost art of conversation would be virtually extinct. But take a step back, cool guy, and realize there is a deep, dark underbelly to "The Meadows." Read on and remember: Atlantic City is lovely this time of year. With 'The Hangover's' release on DVD, thoughts will immediately enter (or re-enter) many mens' heads about making another trip out to The City of No Rules.
Inhibitions: gone. Savings account: gone. Pants: gone.
Without men trying to one-up each other on Vegas stories, the lost art of conversation would be virtually extinct. But take a step back, cool guy, and realize there is a deep, dark underbelly to "The Meadows." Read on and remember: Atlantic City is lovely this time of year.
1. You'll become a raging, dying alcoholic. ('Leaving Las Vegas')
Every time you wake up in some Bellagio (OK, Stratosphere) bedroom with last night's dinner experiencing an Out Of Body Experience, just remember Hollywood agent Ben Sanderson's bender in The Whole Year Inn. Nicolas Cage allegedly binge drank for two weeks to "prepare" for his role. Acting is hard.
2. Combining weed, mescaline, acid, coke, uppers, a pint of raw ether and amyl nitrates may surprisingly have unintended and negative side effects. ('Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas')
When journalist Raoul Duke and cohort Dr. Gonzo travel to Vegas to ostensibly cover the Mint 400 motorcycle race, they throw themselves into a debauched, drug-filled trip that involves freakish lizards, a demented circus and large knives. Cliff Notes version: leave the ether at home.
3. Your wife will leave you for James Caan. ('Honeymoon in Vegas')
Proof that, at times, money and power can be more important than looks, Tommy Korman (Caan) promises to erase Jack Singer's debt if he can spend the weekend with Jack's fiancée. And when a badass like Caan takes your woman, all you can do is just stand there and take it (unless you end up in a plane with skydiving Elvises, then it just gets weird.)
4. Worse, your wife will leave you for Robert Redford... then have sex with him for money. ('Indecent Proposal')
When David and Diana Murphy need money to finance David's real estate scheme, they naturally do the most fiscally prudent thing by going to Vegas and (spoiler!) not actually winning a lot of money. When handsome billionaire John Gage offers a million bucks for one night with Diana, you could actually hear, if you listened closely, every married couple in America having the same "What if..." conversation.
5. You'll make a lot of money, but feel like a scumbag. ('Rain Man')
If you have an exceptionally smart, yet socially inept, autistic brother -- and you are a complete, immoral a-hole -- your first thought will be, "I can profit off this." Raymond makes Charlie enough money to stave off the collectors, but alas, Charlie's conscience gets the better of him as he takes Raymond away from Sin City.
6. You'll lose a lot of money and pride and blow your chance with Dorothy. ('Swingers')
Who can forget the first time they saw Mikey throw down $300 -- most likely a good chunk of his total net worth -- only to receive three lousy chips with which to play blackjack. After going broke and being demoted to the old-lady-and-biker table, Mikey can't even seal the deal with a 'Wizard of Oz' lookalike ready to see his Man Behind the Curtain. The pinnacle of heartbreak.
7. The glamorous, glitzy world of professional stripping -- sorry, exotic dancing -- actually has a slight downside. ('Showgirls')
It's not like this was ever supposed to be 'A Chorus Line' in Vegas or anything, but if 'Showgirls' shows one thing, it's that being a Vegas stripper, while potentially lucrative, has enough negatives to make the average runaway pine for a safer cocktail waitress job. That, and the fact that we can never watch 'Saved By the Bell' reruns the same way again.
8. A lot of holes in the desert, and a lot of problems are buried in these holes. ('Casino')
The best way in or out of Vegas is by car, as it's only then you can see just how close the city is to.. .absolutely nothing except the desert. The odds of you getting caught up in some gangster scheme are minimal, but do you really want to take that chance?
9. If you go there for an arm wrestling contest, the best thing that can happen is that you're the winner of an arm wrestling contest. ('Over the Top')
The not-at-all-ridiculously-named Lincoln Hawk is a trucker that, for reasons you really shouldn't care about, has to drive cross-country with his estranged, military school-bred son. Oh, and he's also, naturally, an avid arm wrestler who ends up competing in the National Arm Wrestling Tournament. All we remember is Robert Loggia acting gruff, a competitor drinking castor oil, and trucker Hawk, in a stunning coincidence, winning a truck as the grand prize.
10. Actors only: you might end up in a horrific, clichéd movie. ('What Happens in Vegas,' 'Vegas Vacation,' etc)
A cautionary tale to actors considering a role in a Las Vegas-based movie: the iconic city can be a character in and of itself in a good movie, but can easily act as a replacement for any semblance of plot or character development in a bad one. Pick your role carefully or you might end up starring in a hackneyed, derivative comedy. Then again, it may just be the next cult classic (Who knew Vegas was "The city that never sleeps"?):