The only time I had heard mention of Stan Helsing was when Peter wrote up the trailer for Transylmania, and now that it seems to be getting some sort of theatrical release on 10/23 -- despite hitting video shelves on 10/27 -- we've been granted a trailer with which to finally compare the horror parodies. And guess what? They look equally, terrifyingly unfunny.

Brought to us by just one of the brains behind Scary Movie (yeah, because it turned out so well with two of them), the eponymous slacker (Steve Howey) finds out he's a descendant of Van Helsing and entrusted with defending some small town from the knock-off likes of Freddy, Jason, Chucky, Mike Myers, Leatherface, Pinhead, and -- if the IMDB cast list is to be believed -- Michael Jackson. (It's only a casket if someone nails it shut, I guess.)

I guess that's as clever an excuse as any to justify the five-year gap between this and an original that was risible enough. Have no fear, though: Stan Helsing's got all the dick jokes and Leslie Nielsen that Van left out... and on Blu-ray at that!
CATEGORIES Horror