CATEGORIES Top 25
We crunched the box office receipts and weighed them against our esteemed assessments, and what we've come up with is a list of the most profitable movies that aren't worth the celluloid they were printed on -- or at least the millions they earned at the box office. (Minimum take to make our list: $100 mil.) Looking for some themes? Start with sequels, superheroes and scientific inaccuracy ...
We crunched the box office receipts and weighed them against our esteemed assessments, and what we've come up with is a list of the most profitable movies that aren't worth the celluloid they were printed on -- or at least the millions they earned at the box office. (Minimum take to make our list: $100 mil.) Looking for some themes? Start with sequels, superheroes and scientific inaccuracy ... -- By Adam Duerson
25. 'Armageddon' (1998)
Nothing in this appropriately dubbed disaster pic makes anything close to scientific sense, right down to the plan to divert a Texas-sized asteroid by digging a hole in it and blowing it up. And when we finally got over our wasted 10 bucks, there was Steven Tyler moaning the movie's theme, 'I Don't Want to Miss a Thing,' on the radio for the next six months. Roger Ebert put it best: "No matter what they're charging to get in, it's worth more to get out."
• Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 40%
• Box Office Gross: $201 million
24. 'Bad Boys II' (2003)
The first chapter in this urbanized buddy cop story was far from perfect, watchable mostly due to the undeniable charm and chemistry of its fast-talking leads, Will Smith and Martin Lawrence. But it's a masterpiece compared to the follow-up, which came a highly unnecessary eight years later. Overblown, under-funny and Michael Bay-ed beyond belief (one scene involving a car chase that mows down half of a third-world village is particularly repulsive), it's 'Bad' alright. And not meaning good.
• Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 23%
• Box Office Gross: $138 million
23. 'Wild Hogs' (2007)
You can easily picture the get-together, perhaps at a BBQ, where Tim Allen convinced John Travolta, William H. Macy and Martin Lawrence (surely the easiest sell) to come over to the dark side of "make-a-quick-buck" filmmaking. Pile on top of that foundation a midlife-crisis theme, motorcycles, lots of leather and some tasteless homophobia jokes and there you have all the makings of a ... "make-a-quick-buck" flick.
• Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 14%
• Box Office Gross: $168 million
22. 'Spider Man 3' (2007)
... But part 3 could have been sooo good! The lead actors were back, as was director Sam Raimi, with two of the coolest Spidey villains and a $258 million budget to blow through. Easy peasy, right? Raimi messed that all up with questionable casting -- spindly Topher Grace as Venom -- and by heaping on a third antagonist (an overacting James Franco) plus equal amounts of lovey dovey drama, over-the-top humor and, most grievously, an evil Peter Parker cool-catting down the street (this is how a splatter-horror guru depicts "dark"?).
• Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 62%
• Box Office Gross: $336 million
21. 'X-Men Origins: Wolverine' (2009)
Clearly somebody at 20th Century Fox doesn't get the allure of Wolverine. He's mysterious; a loner. And that's the way we like it. An origins story about the ornery cigar chomper was the last thing any self-respecting X-Men fan ever asked for. But there it was ... And there it went, disappearing from screens while barely recouping its expenses. Just to prove Hollywood doesn't learn its lesson, the same outfit is planning a spin-off featuring Deadpool, who can't talk and doesn't have a head.
• Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 36%
• Box Office Gross: $179 million