Oh no they didn't! Like you, I watch TV. And, like you, I'll occasionally switch over to MTV in hopes that they'll finally play a music video (what's that?), but get stuck watching a group of 15 year-old snobs curse the high heavens when daddy says he's not getting them that BMW convertible after all. Amazingly, everything that's wrong with this country is somehow included in this one show; evidently, we're obsessed with watching rich people spend lots of money on absurd teen rituals (an ice statue for seven grand?) while other, less fortunate teenagers beg their high-spending peers to grant them permission to attend "the greatest party ever!" It's sick. It's twisted. And yet, so many people love to watch it -- hence, the following:

Our sister site TV Squad reports MTV Studios will dish out a fictional, direct-to-DVD flick called Super Sweet 16: The Movie. Obviously based on their hit TV show, Super Sweet 16: The Movie will feature a bunch of your favorite unknown actors (with the exception of "teen sensations Aly and AJ") as they feverishly type on their sidekicks and prepare for the sickest party of the year. My friends, I wish I was making this up; if only TV Squad didn't present us with a horrific trailer, I'd still be holding out hope that someone would squash the project before my unborn child had time to text message his (or her) final American Idol vote. What next? A Jackass movie? Oh wait ... Anyway, The Squad has the trailer, and I have a headache -- look for this masterpiece to show up in your teen's Netflix queue real soon.