I've been hearing rumblings about this around the internets and in magazines for the past few weeks. Matt Groening told Entertainment Weekly in this week's Summer Movie Preview: "You'll see anatomy that you may not want to see." I thought it was a joke. Friends, it is not a joke. I don't really know how else to say it: Bart Simpson's yellow genitalia will be on display for all to see in the upcoming Simpsons movie. Newsweek reports: "It happens early in The Simpsons Movie, when the animated 10-year-old takes a dare from his goofball father, Homer, to skateboard naked through the streets of Springfield. Hidden by plants and picket fences, he whizzes along, past kids, down hills, through traffic lights, until, in one shocking moment, little Bart flashes his little part to the entire world. Which may make this the first Hollywood film to show that kind of skin and to escape an R rating." Wow. Really? Just ... just give me a minute here.
For years, Donald Duck walked around without pants, and we said nothing! Now look what it's led to! Bart Simpson's dong? Is nothing sacred? What's next? Live footage of Garfield being neutered? Betty Boop getting bopped? Peppermint Patty finally exploring that long-suppressed lesbianism? Maybe the writers of the film feel like in order to compete with the more outrageous humor of the Family Guys and South Parks, they've got to up the ante. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt here, I'm sure they'll make the reveal funny. Still ... really? Poor Bart's 10 years old -- there's no way he could have legally consented to these images being released! Both the Newsweek and the Entertainment Weekly articles are good reads for Simpsons fans, be sure to check them out. I feel the show's been off for a while, but there was a run of about ten years where nothing was funnier. The movie opens on July 27th, and I really can't wait to see the thing. The movie I mean, not ... the thing.