food on his shirt, and wonder, "Why should I care about this?" as my mind wanders off to thoughts about whether I need to buy more gift wrap. Besides, I am sometimes a messy eater too, so I can't really pick on Mr. Gibson. And I can't think of anything the least bit cutting to say about director Gus Van Sant being arrested on a DUI charge; I just feel a bit sad. Meanwhile, the gossip world rolls on, at all times of the year, so this week's roundup includes marriage, birth, paternity tests, birthday gifts, and celebrity tattoos.
- It's been a big news week for Britney Spears. Not only did she get a hand tattoo, but was also voted World's Worst Celebrity Dog Owner in an online poll. At least it looks like Santa has brought me my special Christmas present of not ever having to see certain bits of Spears again.
- In case you're interested, Defamer provides us with a glimpse of Jake Gyllenhaal's birthday gifts. Or were they gifts for Hanukkah? It's so hard to tell with socks.
- The cheapest and most low-key Hollywood-related wedding this year: Lara Flynn Boyle gets married in San Antonio, at a cost of $36. Please do not tell my husband that it is possible for two people to be married for under $100.
- Another proud Hollywood papa: Sean "Puff Daddy P. Diddy" Combs is now the father of twin girls. No word yet on the names, which hopefully they won't change as often as their rapper/actor dad's nickname has.
- Speaking of daddies: A judge ruled that Anna Nicole Smith's daughter will have to submit to a paternity test. Obviously, the gift of getting Smith out of the weekly celebrity news roundup will have to wait until next year.
- This week's scary photo: Go Fug Yourself walks us through a range of the good, the bad, and the ugly in the outfits Beyonce Knowles has been wearing lately to promote Dreamgirls.
- Mattel is rolling out the Hilary Duff Barbie doll, who stands on a red carpet and waves an award. Which award is that supposed to be, exactly? It looks like a silver Oscar. And is it supposed to belong to Duff, or is she presenting it to George Clooney Ken? (Which I would absolutely buy. For my sister, I mean.)