Good ol' Val Kilmer has worked almost continuously since his first Top Secret! film, even if he seems to swim in and out of the spotlight. Lately, he's been back in, sailing from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang into a number of other works from the current film Deja Vu to a musical stint as Moses and a television miniseries. Now, as he's profiled by the new editor of Black Book Magazine for its December/January issue, he muses over a life of salad dressing.

I guess in-between scenes and jobs, Kilmer has amused himself by coming up with alternative salad empire to compete with the likes of Paul Newman's "Newman's Own." He's got the branding, the idea, and the motivation all set to go. In his own organic food company, Kilmer would have ValZone. Get it? Val's Own? The logo would be a picture of Val, all prosthetically enhanced to resemble Newman. Where Newman lists the charities that will benefit from the proceeds, Kilmer will list his expenses, as the dressing would be "100 percent organic, 100 percent profit." On the list include his car and his kids, and yes, they were listed in that order. If imdb is right in suggesting that Val learned he was getting divorced from CNN, then maybe his imagination is fuelled by the looming prospect of killer alimony.

While it's obviously supposed to be funny, it comes off a bit oily. Perhaps a better place for Kilmer's food empire musings would be on SNL, although now the joke has already been spoiled.

[via Radar Online]