Hey, I have a great idea! Let's find a (somewhat) cool Japanese horror movie and then remake it in English! It'll be great, we'll ... What? You say it's been done to freakin' death by now? Well then why are Edward Burns and Shannyn Sossamon starring in a remake of Takashi Miike's One Missed Call? (Yes, folks, comedy this lame can only be inspired by trends this endless. My apologies.)

Anyway, Miike's film has to do with a young girl whose friends receive some decidedly deadly cell-phone calls, only to wind up (you guessed it) dead. But when Main Girl gets a call of her own, she turns to Detective Guy to help save the day. (I'll leave it to you to decide who plays Main Girl and who plays Detective Guy.) The new version comes from novelist Andrew Klavan (Don't Say a Word) and Eric Valette, a Frenchman making his English-language debut. Production's already underway, Warner Bros. will be distributing, and Miike's version is presently available on DVD.

Notice how you see very few Japanese remakes of American horror films ...