SufferingWatching a movie based on a video game has seldom been a pleasurable experience, which is why movie critics are already sharpening their pencils for pun-tastic ways in which to dress down MTV's latest attempt. With the announcement of their acquisition of the movie rights to the PS2/Xbox hit The Suffering, MTV has not only given writers a gift, but ultimately will have schooled the world in irony (though doubly so if the movie defies the laws of reality and is actually any good). The game, created by Midway Games, is about a death row prisoner who finds himself in the middle of some demonic chaos, and has spawned a sequel, The Suffering: Ties That Bind, which is due for release on September 26th and features the voices of Michael Duncan Clarke and Rachel Griffiths.

Personally, I am waiting for the end-all, be-all of video game flicks -- Pong: The Movie. In my dream version, a poor Paddle #1 (Keanu Reeves) dreams of making it big playing for the Blip City Deflectors and playing for the ultimate Pong prize: The PixelCup. He is besieged on all sides by adversity, from a failed and abusive father (Speed co-star Dennis Hopper) to the trash-talking Ball (Johnny Knoxville) who is in league with Paddle #2 (also Keanu, in an Oscar-worthy dual role). It would also feature a talking monkey in a dress, a climactic car chase to rival The French Connection and would end in a musical number, "The Pong And Winding Road". Top that, MTV!