HaikuIn this modern society dependent on sound bites and single-sentence synopses, it was only a matter of time before someone thought to apply (albeit very loosely) the ancient Japanese poetic 5/7/5 syllable form of haiku to film criticism. Here are a few recent movies, reduced to their essence through super-economic choice of words. Feel free to submit your own haiku reviews of movies you saw this summer (one per post please).

WAR OF THE WORLDS [PG-13]
Advanced aliens?
Traversing the galaxy
No penicillin?

THE ISLAND [PG-13]
Michael Bay, learning,
By Serlingesque irony,
Leaden turds don't float.

FANTASTIC FOUR [PG-13]
Stan Lee, comic god
Fallen, but not as far as
Affleck's DareDevil.

MUST LOVE DOGS [PG-13]
So much soft-focus
On Lane and Cusack, I think
I have glaucoma.

MARCH OF THE PENGUINS
[G]
Watching tirelessly
These funny, noble creatures
No penguins humping?

THE SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS [PG]
Four hot teenage girls
Me, white man over 30
I feel so dirty.

THE PERFECT MAN [PG]
Poor Hilary Duff
Too bad Mommy can't manage
Acting lessons, too.
CATEGORIES Cinematical